Thank you for your comments. They were warm and informative.
I’ve been writing down the pros and cons but its not getting easier to decide what is right and what I will regret later on.

I’m not looking for anyone to tell me what to do but I want to be sure that leaving someone with compulsive gambling isn’t the same as leaving a partner diagnosed with cancer. That’s what I feel like I’m doing when I consider packing up my things. I feel guilty, like I’m quitting on someone that needs help. That I can help fix if I stay…

When I start to make an actual plan to leave I get flushed with tears and anxiety. I care for him so much. I didn’t want to have to consider leaving but I can’t ignore the feeling that staying with him will bring out the worst in me.
(My father is bi-polar alcoholic and I am irregularly taking anxiety medication, I feel as though its harder and harder to control my own happiness with all of this going on)

What I want is for him to have not gambled and to not do it again. It’s not what I imagined for us. At the same time, I know that unless he truly wants help Ill be stuck in this cycle.

Another reason why I consider staying is because he’s always paid me back and made sure I was made whole. Although , after emptying out his bank accounts and maxing out his credit cards he made it impossible to pay his half of things moving forward. Maybe this isn’t such a valid point.

His dad stepped in and said ” I wont let you end up on the streets. But you have to keep going to your job, see a psychiatrist and go to therapy” . My Fiance only agreed to two of the requirements . He refuses to go to GamANON or Group Therapy. Even though all the psychiatrist I spoke to recommend BOTH for prevention. One psychiatrist told me over the phone that IF he doesn’t want to go to group therapy he is 100% likely to relapse and gamble since its behavioral..

I asked him if he really wanted help or was doing it so his dad would support him.. He answered “I dont know”. Then, after he saw a text from my mom wishing I’d come home threatened his Dad and I that he wouldn’t go to a psychiatrist any more.

What if he hasn’t truly hit rock bottom, doesn’t want help BUT just wants to rely on his father for financial support until he can find a way to bet again…

You are all lovely and kind and I’m grateful to have found a forum where I can communicate with other people that understand. I’m sorry if my writing comes out emotion-less or whiney. I am perplexed and numbed by the entire situation.