Have a great time in Sydney! If you enjoy it half as much as you deserve to you will have the best time ever!
I understand you concerns about going there. As you have posted quite often recently self-exclusion has been a formidable friend in helping you not to gamble and, in Sydney, he/she won’t be there. So you have to replace it somehow. What about discussing these concerns with Damian? Perhaps tell him about your concerns about what might happen and that you need his help in keeping you on the straight and narrow. Don’t be afraid to ask for his help. It is a sign of immense strength and self-awareness, not weakness.
I totally agree with Tim’s words of wisdom about gambling urges. When I first entered GH I was amazed that some people, early in their recovery, would say that they had no gambling thoughts or urges. So why was I having loads? Did that mean I was worse than them? I found the courage to bring this up and I believe this helped my recovery in a huge way. By acknowledging their presence we diminish their power. It’s like being in bed and being scared of a shadow at the bottom of the bed. Do we stay in bed, scared and frightened? Or get out of bed and turn the light on?
Anyway, enough of my rambling! I truly hope you have a fantastic break and look forward to speaking to you soon!
"Success is how high you bounce once you hit rock bottom"