I too had an interesting convo with the guys online (missed ya at the 5pm session) It seems that having this addiction is seen as a blessing??? I dont really get it to be fair but as for the guilt aspect, you are right, you need to move on, we are not bad people, I too had guilt, I am still ashamed of what I have done in the past but I am fighting to make sure that I will not make the same mistakes again.
YOU can do this, this addiction will always be simmering away in the back-ground, we just need to keep it on half boil… I never thought I could cope with the thought of NEVER having an actual tangible ‘fix’ to this addiction but I honestly now believe that I (all CG) can work through our urges. I FORGIVE MYSELF, I am focused on my recovery and can already look back on my previous life and be thankful for GT and the friendships that I have found.
Good luck Kathryn and enjoy your trip away, dont let gambling dictate your happiness!!Players do not continuously lose… They continuously nearly win!!