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So he rang her, the woman i HATE for keeping this secret for so long.  What was the good of it…nothing i tell you.  I have never felt pain like this and ive had 3 kids lol (just)
So how is this…hes going to meet them on Saturday…they are going to sit down and explain to the child that they are going to do a DNA test.  HE IS GOING TO MEET HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Needless to say, i went balistic..wouldnt it be better if we get the results FIRST!!!Oh no, they had a lovely chat, him and the she devil, laughing, everything is FINE. ITS NOT FUCKING FINE. How lovely for them to have the first contact, the first meeting of many im sure. I know im being a bitch but i do not care one bit. He even called her ‘love’. How wonderful, the happy family.  I cant believe this is happening…can someone please pinch, slap, kick me and wake me up from this nightmare??? PLEASE!!
He says he didnt mean it…’should i have called her a ****???’ he asked me… YES YOU SHOULD CAUSE SHE IS ONE.
Ok, ive had a rant, im sorry  but it had to be done.  We have talked a lot. We never talk. I told him he needs to start talking to me, all the time, about everything or we are not going to get through this. We also told our Bubba Brea. I didnt feel it was right if Sasha (the love child) knew anything before our baby girl did. She took it amazingly well. She thought it was much worse…jail or murder. I could do both at this stage…
I truly dont know if i can do this. I feel so betrayed. He didnt know about it, i know that but god, this is a life thing. I dont know if i can ever accept her, shes not my blood, im out of the loop now.  The one thing, really good and amazing thing that I AND I ALONE had was the children. His children.  My bestie, Jode, asked me what i needed.  I told her i need it to be yesterday before this happened.  I dont know what im going to do. i am not coping big time. I am crying at least every 15 mins, he cant understand it.  I dont know what else to say.
I havent gambled and that is a positive..i hope you have all had a wonderful gamble free day.
Bye for now, Kathryn xx
ps…if there is a movie made Al, Anjelina Jolie needs to play me!!!Fighting the good fight…One day at a time