I ‘think’ I might have answered you in my post already, indirectly.
Your heart appears to be telling you to let go but your mind is afraid to do so.
Apart from a longer time without gambling Ell, I have no more to base my happiness on than you have. If you let go, you will be like me. We both love CGs, we are both aware what compulsive gambling means but we both want to let go, forget the sadness and celebrate our lives because our CGs ‘are’ controlling their addictions. Nobody told me when to let go – it was my decision- nobody could tell me – I didn’t even know myself until it happened. It would appear I could have done it after 9 months and the result would have been the same.
I haven’t said it for a time but there is no judgement on this forum and I certainly cannot judge anyone. Whatever you decide to do will be accepted by me.
You are trying to see the solution from 2 sides and they are different but fundamentally you both want the same thing – to live without the compulsion to gamble in your lives. Recoveries are different – they don’t conform but as long as they keep moving forward you will be going the right way.
Fear diminishes our lives. The more effort you put into visualizing a successful outcome, depicting with crystal clarity what ‘you’ want to happen, the more your feelings of confidence with increase.
I use the expression that I will not live with the addiction to gamble again. Like me Ell – if you trust him and he lets you down badly again – you will know what to do.