#2359
looby loo
Participant

Well, here is the update you were looking forward to hearing V.
There was no meeting in MK – text late Saturday evening to say he had to work, which he did, but I still had a ‘gut’ feeling.
Didn’t speak to him until Monday at work, couldn’t get him on mobile (know now that it is a certain girly colour and he of course wont answer it ) but did say he had gambled. I didn’t at that point know the extent and have to say was somewhat devoid of what he was saying. Its not my problem…………………..
Finally spoke to him more in depth last night and the gf was also with him. Apparently he gambled all of his wages when he got paid Thursday, didn’t pay rent and now has to move out on Friday – again …………………….. I know exactly how much that was as he had earlier in the year told me how much he was now earning and believe you me its not chicken feed !
So, we had a long conversation about re-committing and getting further support for his problem, by him and for him alone, work, lack of social network/friendships, inability to go out, and it was clear from the conversations that he DOES recognise that the reason he is in this situation again is down to gambling and only gambling. Highlighting to him that earning sh1te loads of money but then throwing it all away is worthless and he might just as well give up the job and get that support instead, but that has to be his decision….
Today I have re-evaluated the conversation and still feel devoid of it. It is not affecting me, there is nothing I can do about it and my life is quite nice thank you (other than a terminally ill family member). The gf text me to say she has told him he has to sort out Easter, as its his family and there is no use her bailing him out ! To which I agreed.
So, we go on holiday next Saturday to celebrate our Wedding Anniversary and what happens, happens.
Stay strong for yourself people, its the only defence against this bl***dy addiction. x
PS: Forgot to say, there are positives this time, 1. He hasn’t gone underground 2. He is talking about things (small consolations I know, but I see these as positives)
Everyone has a destiny, it's up to us whether we choose to follow it though !Looby Loo– 3/6/2013 1:51:33 PM: post edited by Looby Loo.