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Originally posted by sasapapac

… when will this end?? …

Good morning Sasa, welcome to GT. My name is Larry and I am a compulsive Gambler, my last bet was August 13, 2009.
You ask, ‘when will this end??", I can’t say that my addiction ended on the 13th, this was only my "clean date", and the first day of a series of gambling free days to follow; this addiction can not be cured but can be ******** as it has been in my and other lives.  So the answer to the first question mark is that the addiction will not end, it will remain. And, as you have already found in your past efforts to stop only to return in a bad way, it will actually grow if you let it — compulsive gambling is a progressive disease.
The answer to the other "?" of your question when, is: This, the control gambling has over your life, will end when you stop giving in to the urges that drive you to gamble; when you choose not to gambling for just one day; and during that time begin working on changes in your life the trigger the urges. Then on the next day, and the ones following that one, say no again and continue working on the needed changes in your character.
Doing this is not an easy or automatic task; but, with an acceptance that you are powerless over gambling – that your life has become unmanageable;  a belief that a Power greater than you can restore you to a normal way of thinking and living — restore you to the humble and nice person that you are; plus, the openmindedness and willingness to turn over your limited will power to such a Higher Power, you will be able to end the control. These conditions are part of the steps in the Gamblers Anonymous 12 Step Program, but are steps needed to be taken in order to arrest this addiction no mater which recovery program you choose to follow. Following basic principals to change your life will change how you respond to any urges to gamble; and will in fact, greatly reduce those urges and help remove or weaken the triggers that drives you to gamble, making living a gambling free life obtainable.
During this time there are barriers you can put in place to limit access to any funds available, and to restrict the opportunities and places to gamble. Reading the post here and participating in the different Groups and chat rooms will give you ideas on how to apply these needed barriers and encouragement to follow through with these options and with your recovery program. You are not alone in your troubles, you will find help and friendship here — we have all experiences the same regrets and remorse.
God’s speed, use your Higher Power to guide and strengthen you.Larry"Day Two Is Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will continue to be  gambling free.