Well that didn’t last long!! Don’t feel empowered anymore. Feel stupid. Is it that it is so ingrained in us to ‘enable’ /want to help our offspring? How am I going to stop? He knows all my triggers so well. I tried to get on the advice line but it disconnects before I get to speak to anyone, sooo frustrating. So I have paid for a ticket for him to get back to the UK. He has somewhere to stay, he’s signed on and applied for four jobs, all in two hours. He is a survivor but I feel stupid, disappointed in myself for bailing him out when I said I wouldn’t. There’s a part of me that feels relieved that he is going back to the UK, that I have planted seeds for rehab even though he is not ready for it. I have compromised my own finances but the stress of him being in a foreign country was too much for me and I needed some relief. Is that selfish of me? I am having so many doubts right now.
