Hi Berber,
Your mind, heart and body have been through so much for so long it is no wonder you are tired and frustrated!
I think this is a very good decision for you to get help for yourself. I hope the professional you have chosen is a good fit for you.
My husband has only just begun to test the waters of recovery, so I know we have a long way to go, especially when I see the challenges you and your husband are still facing so much farther down the path.
With underlying issues of my own I think I may need to get serious about finding a therapist for myself soon. My general physician strongly recommended that I include yoga in whatever treatment I choose. Have you ever done yoga?
The challenges we face are tough, no doubt about it, but I think I am growing as person because of them (more precisely because of HOW I have learned to deal with them), just as you continue to do!
 I love what Velvet said to you… "To make something good out of something so bad is surely one of the best things we will ever do?" I think you have handled yourself brilliantly Berber. Keep it up, I know you can…
 — 9/2/2013 4:02:05 AM: post edited by adele.