I am sorry to hear how you are hurting. I am not very good at giving advice or supportive words, but your post really hit a chord with me. I could hear your sadness through your words, but I also heard a person who didn’t like the decision they made but felt confident that it was the correct one. Even though you mention doubt (who doesn’t have doubt) you seem to know that you are on the right course and from what I have read you tightened the laces on your boots and that is why you came to the decision you did.
You did what Velvet has been emphasizing to me, you took care of yourself first. You will be in my thoughts.