Hi So Sad
Yes I have a good idea ! You did nothing wrong, in fact you did everything within your power to love and support someone who for their own reasons decided not to change, leaving you very other little choice except a further future of misery and false hopes and promises, lies and deception (sorry was going on a bit there) or the future you have chosen for yourself and the chance to live your life in the way that you so choose it to be.
Although it may not have been what you would have wanted and the sadness is obvious in your post, it is none the less a success in terms of this addiction that you have had the strength, knowledge and the courage to walk away and not to be brought down any further.
Sometimes enough is enough and when enough happens then we can go forwards, try new things, meet new people (which we can trust eventually !! hopefully) in a future free from all that the addiction creates. You may have helped your partner in the long run, perhaps he has had to lose you to in order to feel a change is in order.
For me each time something happened it became harder to pull it back until really there was nothing to pull back except a heap more **** for myself. Doesn’t mean i’m not sad or miss him just that eventually it evaporated and I no longer consider it worth the fight.
So Sad I wish you every success with your future and whatever it holds but most of all I wish you the happiness that you deserve. Please let us know how you go on.
Jenny xWe see things not as they are, but through how we are today x