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#1530
mnn2300
Participant

So we are coming up on 3 weeks since my brother moved in with us.
No sign of his gambling, in fact he really never leaves the house/yard unless he is with us since he does not have a car. Has not said anything about the filter on the computer – not sure if that’s because he hasn’t tried to get to a gambling site or he just hasn’t mentioned that he is blocked from those kinds of sites. So far so good on that respect. He paid his rent the day his Social Security check came, so why do I feel so much anger towards him? Well I know why, I just don’t know how to let it go.
1.) I am angry because of the position he is in – having to live with us because he has never taken responsibility to plan for his future and his gambling that took away what he had. How do some of you deal with anger? My wife and I get out of the house on our own but he’s always there when we get back.
2.) I have diminished lung capacity due to an illness a couple years ago, so I really really have a hard time with him smoking. I don’t let him smoke in the house but do let him smoke outside, but I still smell it on him and his clothes. I have to have an air purifier going in the house 24/7 due to the smoke that clings to him and his clothes. I really don’t have a problem with my lungs/breathing unless I am around smoke (or exercising excessively).
3.) he talks all the time. My job keeps me on the phone 8 hours a day and most days all I want when I get home is peace and quiet and I’ve told him this and he says he understood and was better for a day, however he has a hard time in silence, he has to fill it with something and that usually him talking about nothing important usually about about some TV show he watched, or some sports team that I don’t follow and could care less about. I reminded him that I told him I needed some quite time and he said he was sorry but 2 hours later he’s back at it again.
I’m kind of feeling like the brother in the Prodigal Son story, the one that did what he should, yet I have to take care of the brother who went off and had fun and blew all his money and now ***** someone to take care of him.
Sorry to whine and complain. I just don’t know how to let the anger I feel go, any ideas?