#1964
nomore 56
Participant

Hi Nitenurse, Velvet is right, you already sound more positiv! It is very important for us as family members to do something for ourselves. Meeting with friends for dinner or having a play date with the kids will take your mind of the misery, at least for a while and you can see that life has so much more to offer than battling the addiction. I think it is very important not to isolate, which is what I did while my hb was gambling, especially during the years when his addiction completely got out of control. You will find an abundance of emotional support on this site and would like to add something on the practical side. It is much easier to support your cg if you can find some peace of mind re your finances. If you can, take over paying the bills. Take his name off your credit cards and vice versa. Pull your credit reports to see where you and he stand in re to debt. Don’t do any shared banking as in checking or savings accounts. If you have your own car, make sure it is in your name only. This will probably make him angry but might be necessary to protect yourself down the road. The addiction eats you both alive, it tries to take over everything to stay well and the emotional pressure is more than enough at this time. I wish I would have known back then what I know now, I could have avoided at least some of the destruction my cg caused. Since you live in the US, you might want to check if your state has a council on problem gambling. These councils are a great resource for support and information. Take care of yourself and your children, just because your hb is miserable doesn’t mean you have to be, too!