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Really sad to hear about your story. Your behaviour sounds quite similar to mine when it comes to gambling…

1. You could get an extra job and earn it back within some years?

2. Try counselling or group therapy?

3. Time heals all wounds…Can’t really see any other solution than feel the pain and wait. It will go away, it always does. Someday you hardly remember you ever did this.
Just remember NOT to do it again. If you had all these money in some kind of account…nothing is really changed at this moment…of course your future looks different but not necessarily worse.

As Steev said “you can enjoy life with very little”. The best things in life are free. I know it won’t help much to think about it when you feel as you do now but it’s true.

Try to relax and be kind to yourself right now and try to do some of the things you like.

Wish you the best