I don’t know what you are going through right now specifically, but I would imagine whatever it is, you have been through it before and it fits somewhere in that F&F Cycle we are all so familiar with.
I assume you are once again being emotionally abused and your health is going to suffer because of it. San, I know how awful it is to feel weak and manipulated, and I hope you are able to chat with someone soon.
In the meantime let me just remind you it is OK to reject your son’s addiction – it doesn’t mean you are rejecting him. In fact, to love him is to stand against his addiction!
San, you must take care of yourself. you will be no good to anyone if you let this addiction take you down. Do you keep that list of “answers” handy? Or that list of positive thoughts?
You know enough to realize that as long as your son has enablement, he may not be able to make the decision to stop gambling. And until he makes that decision you have the right to say no. If you are fed up, turn off your phone for awhile … get a new number … move … wear a disguise … whatever it takes to allow you some peace to take care of yourself.
Let us know how you’re doing and know you are being thought of and wished well.