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Dear diary,

More than 10 years ago, my first recovery mentor told me
“I was an irresponsible man but I can do responsible things.”

I thought I understood what he says
When I do it, something was always wrong somewhere , I could not stay responsible.

In the past, I always knew it was wrong to be irresponsible, I wanted to be responsible, but I keep doing the wrong things.

Now I follow God’s word, and became the irresponsible man who started to do responsible things.

My friend could have told me that he was an irresponsible man.
God help change him and help him perform responsible deeds.

He wanted to tell me God says “I am the way” and not “I show you the way” or there is other way”
He keep hinting to me 10 years ago.

Was it too late for me to understand them now?

I was just grateful I did, I could have struggle with recovery for the rest of my life until the day I die
I am actually enjoying recovery now, of course some days are tough,
Let’s rejoice in suffering in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen!