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“Terrified of what I am capable of” summarizes perfectly the mindset of a Compulsive Gambler, when in action.
And you are right. No “win” will satisfy us. Our need to gamble is insatiable once we start. A “win” is a high interest loan.
I feel for you Meghna.
The whole gambling scenario is nothing short of demonic.
We need to turn away from it. It ruins lives.
Money is only the tip of the iceberg.
When it takes your soul, it could be too late.
Never give up.
Life without inviting this madness into our homes can be so much better.
I’m following your thread.
Keep posting.