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#28162
Liberty
Participant

Vera, oh yes the dreaded postman, a good day is when he does not call, looking out of the window and seeing him walk straight past, is a good day!
When you say some days I don’t think about money at all, they really are a blessing, after all our worrying and anxiety does absolutely nothing to change our debts does it, I spend the day transfixed in fear what has changed at the end of that day, not a thing! Except perhaps my health and the stress on the body caused by the mind.
Yes, I went back to the counsellor yesterday I am emailing him later as I feel I know more about him than he does me at this stage, I thought counsellors were meant to ask questions as to statements you make, all he does is sit there and nod! the only thing I was asked was, how has your week been? I felt he was disinterested and quite bored lol
I think I have had more engagement waiting for a bus with a fellow passenger…..
I told him about a problem I have with one of my own well a problem she has actually, and how I feel totally responsible for it, self loathing etc etc he just nodded so I felt he agreed yes everything is your fault!
I think that was what happened to me on my last gambling spree, when I was even more anxious gambling than not gambling I gues you could say it was like due to the consequences so great the medication had worn off, due to over use I developed an immunity to the supposed cure, then I knew I need to mean business, and got rid of my beloved ipad (I miss you ipad) but I don’t miss what you allowed me to do, ipad you were an enabler!

So it certainly has done nothing to help me at this stage!