Thanks Velvet for the welcome and your thoughts on counselling. You are right it is an accomplishment that I want to post here tomorrow after I have gone. I appreciate the encouragement to go!
I have always talked myself out of any help, thinking I have this cased, I can do it on my own, well look how far that has got me….I have only had 3 months of no gambling in seven years and this time I want it to stop for good.
I had no urges today and I am thankful for that but I know that that demon is luring just waiting for a weak moment.
So I will go tomorrow and see if counselling is for me, I am really ashamed to admit to a stranger where I have been and all the time and money wasted, but she should understand.
I am feeling better already just coming and reading other peoples journeys as I know there is hope!