Thanks Velvet for your time and coments ….. knowing he had moved from a place that was very bad …. to a place where he is now working etc was such a relief for me that I wasnt even angry about him lieing to me about it …. I have txt him every night since I crawled out of the shock, emotional and physical that I first went through. A simple ‘good night I love you’ It was some thing we always did. He swore at me once about it I replyed that ‘The txt was not for you the gambler …..t but for my …..t’ . ( he could bar me from his ph or change the number … but hasent, so that in itself says something to me) I have a hope that it gives him something to hold on to in his darkest moments as it does for me. I have a friend that traveks to the place he is at and has met up with him … last time about 3 weeks ago …. apparently he always wants to ‘kno’ what is happening here … has said .yeah sure we could get back together easy, but it would only be a matter of time before it happened again’. He dosent say what ‘It’ is lol I asume he is talking about the gambling. Sometimes my txt include info about whats happening, what I have done, or friends. I hope, as I say it gives him a rope to hang on to. The friend is very honest and knows about the situation well … she feels he is still very confused. realises he has made bad choice, regrets this but simply does not know at this point what to do about it ….. even tho he is a long way away I hope that he will see my contacts as a form of support … as you say ‘ a rock’ I realise that unfortunately because of the way he sets things up it is highly unlikely that he will ever hit the bottom as they say and be arrested or what ever …. be forced to face his prob. Love is obviously not enough …. it is depressing but fact … I understand that he does love me but it is overidden by his gamb …. I still refuse to give up lol …. It is against every thing in me and I hang on to my gut feeling, my strength ….. In a weird way my trust in him ..