Thanks Vera for your post. I would never confront my Cousin as that would not bring peace to me. He is a alcoholic and lives 400 miles from me. I am reading some self help books and I will seek professional help in dealing with this issue if I can’t get a grip on it. My Mom does remember but it is easier for her not to feel anything or confirm my feeling on the issue. She isn’t going to do any cardiac rehab, her choice! I think she is bipolar as everything I have read about the condition fits her. I have decided that when she is in one of her manic moods that I will not be around her. She is very selfish. She will never get help or take medication for it. It is hard to say these things about her but it is reality. I don’t mind being alone but I am lonely at times. I know that I need to meet people and join into activities and I am ready to take the leap. I have my Daughters and Grandson so I am not alone, but I am not their responsibility. I hold my own fate in my hands! I will be alright! I am still dealing with my Husband’s death, It has only been a little over 2 years. I think I’ve done pretty well! I know that I have to deal with any gambling urges as gambling would destroy me! I am working on myself!