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#32939
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Participant

I logged onto my online account for some reason and saw that there was 40 quid freeplay. I said to myself, ‘Give it ten minutes play’ and was all out after 9.
I don’t feel so bad because it wasn’t my money but still feel a tad guilty because I was meant to not gamble anymore.
Also went to the races with some friends on Wednesday – put about 3 quid on each of 8 races. A lot less than I normally do and feel satisfied that I could control it.
As I’ve said before, some of my social life is based on gambling situations and I would prefer to be able to control it rather than stop altogether but I get worried by other people’s stories of getting sucked back in again.
Believe me I don’t think that I am ‘better’ than anyone here – I’m one of the worst if I just judge it on amount lost. I would just like to be ‘normal’…

The bank agreed a repayment plan for my credit card. A little over 1100GBP a month for the next two years. It sound terrifying but it is certainly manageable – far better than the non-plan option anyway! It felt like a great relief when I found out but my first thought was, ‘So how much do I have each month to gamble then?’
I still have about 6 grand to pay off on another credit card (120 a month in interest) and about 3 grand on a third card which I share with my wife – they just increased the credit limit by a couple of grand so that one will have to wait a bit longer…
I know it can be done. Debt free in 2 years and then I can concentrate on getting my savings and retirement fund back. So long as I don’t die/lose my job/relapse badly in the next 20 years I might be able to retire! Now THAT seems like a long time…

Going to try to give up smoking this weekend – done it properly a few times before so I know it’s possible, just a little uncomfortable. My drinking is mainly under control. About once a week I say ‘f it’ and get bladdered. Have to go out with a friend tonight who has her long distance semi-boyfriend visiting – will be a biggie so I have to try to keep it relaxed and not give in to my inevitable smoking urges after a few drinks… At least I am safe in the knowledge that when I come home there won’t be money at the online casino that I can blow in a few seconds while drunk!
Been filling my spare ‘gambling time’ with suitably addictive simulation games – works for me…