Velvet, I very much can understand your insight especially more now that I went to my Gam-Anon meeting last night and my “family” there told me essentially the same thing as you when you say I have allowed my CG’s gambling to affect me too much as I very much have. They offered me the ideas that many of my plans and ideas on how to better the situation while in my head are good decisions for me I still am basing a lot of my decisions on him and his gambling also. I am helping myself without fully “letting go and letting god” and that is my biggest and deepest underlying struggle.
Jenny, my happiness does very often seem to depend on him these days, no matter the amount I supposedly concentrate on me I have yet to find what exactly works for me to actually seperate my happiness from his. I have indeed taken the necessary steps to secure my own finances, and do not feel that I am at any risk financial unless I were to enable him willingly I dont think he could access any of my money