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Welcome to GT! You’ve made the first step coming here and recognizing that you have a problem. I knew I had a gambling problem but I didn’t want to deal with it until I just had enough. There are reasons why we gamble and that is the painful part of recovery, dealing with the demons that make us want to escape our lives. Gambling is just a quick fix not the solution. Can you join GA and get support? GA did help me immensely. Keep posting here because we have all been there and you will receive great advise and support. I still think back on the times that gambling took me away from my family time. Time I can not replace. But we have to forgive ourselves and learn to live a healthy gamble free life. Stay strong and take it one day at a time.