It took me a day or two after my last big loss to finally self exclude! I kept trying to tell myself that they owed me that money back! It wouldn’t have mattered if I did win it though – it would have gone straight on more spins and the whole cycle would start again.
May I suggest you put some other blocks in place? I am only on day 3 clean at the moment and very much still in the “bad hangover” period of feeling utterly terrible. I know this feeling will eventually fade so have put other measures in place – cancelling use of my credit cards and putting a gambling blocker on my laptop. I will also be making sure that if, by some miracle, I come into unexpected money – it will be going into someone elses account where I cant get a hold of it.
One thing I have learned after 6 years of binge-quit-relapse-binge-quit-relapse-binge etc., is that we cannot let our guard down. There is no “cure” for us unfortunately, we have to show this addiction that we mean business and never EVER make that first best – because you can guarantee it wont be our last.
Keep your chin up and look forward to a brighter, happier, more sociable gamble-free future… I know I am 🙂
Sending strength and love x