31 July 2013 at 11:07 pm #9337
Hi all. My name is Bryan. Some might remember me, some may not, and to the rest of you hello. I have a story, as of of you do, but I don’t want to get into right now. Basically I had the dream of being a professional poker player. I wanted a life with tons of money and freedom. Instead, I got tons of debt. Tons. This doesn’t give me any freedom. Well this morning I decided that last night was it. The way I have lead my life makes no god damn sense. If I want a life of freedom and financial stability I’m not going to get it gambling. Some people may get that, not me. Now I face a hard reality of catch up….I’m 32. I have a wife and baby I love. They don’t need a degenerate dad chasing a pipe dream ruining everyone’s life. I don’t need that life. So here is to me saying **** my past. I can’t change it. I can’t reverse it. I can be a man and fix it. There, I said it. Now I need to do it.
Bfunk out1 August 2013 at 8:04 am #9338DuncKeymaster
Its so good to read that your going to commit to a new way of life where gambling doesnt play a part.
Im looking forward to following your progress
Harry25 year poker player, 25 year Hierarchal fool, 25 year ego boost… Intellectualisation was my down fall, simplicity was my salvation1 August 2013 at 2:28 pm #9339
Thanks Harry. I’m preparing for my ups and downs, but I’m choosing to focus on a better future. Instead of thinking about poker and quick money. I’m thinking about a long process of saving, paying debt, and thinking about a retirement someday. No matter what I try to talk myself into, I can’t have any of it with poker. In fact, I probably can’t have anything at all with poker.
So today I choose to look at the big picture. Today I will accept the damage I’ve done, and look at a future I can still have.
Bryan2 August 2013 at 6:33 pm #9340
Well it’s day 3 after my blow up. I’m hoping its my final blow up, but I will never know. Anyway today I will not place a bet. It will not help me. I dug a whole with gambling that has given me many problems. Gambling won’t fix them.
Good news is I do have other things in my life to be thankful for. Those are the things I’m focussing on today.
Bryan2 August 2013 at 9:02 pm #9341
Congrats on your marriage and baby Bryan! A new life to give you every reason to quit gambling. Take it one day at a time. I’m trying to get myself back on track too after a few crazy expensive gambling episodes! Hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Do you go to GA, Bryan? ‘Could be just what you need to get some immediate support.
Keep posting!3 August 2013 at 5:14 pm #9342
Today is another day. I had rough moments of frustration last night. I guess it it expected.
I figure it’s natural. The thing is, this time I’m not going to focus on negatives. I’ve wasted to much time being negative. I’m going to do what I can to have a great weekend. I hope you guys do as well. Be strong.
Bryan4 August 2013 at 3:07 pm #9343
Happy Sunday everyone. I don’t really have any new updates, but I’d like to keep my recovery fresh in my mind. I am not going to gamble today. I’m going to enjoy my family, and concentrate on positives in my life.
Bryan5 August 2013 at 6:14 pm #9344
Monday. New week. Starting my week strong. I’m not gambling today. I’m going to stay positive. I’m going to eat right, and excersise a little. Thoughts of extra debt are haunting me a bit, but the only thing I can do is accept. No need to waste energy fighting the truth. I will stay on track. Slow and steady
This week I will move forward to improve my life.
Bryan5 August 2013 at 6:28 pm #9345cat438Participant
Bryan, WTG on making the decision to stop accumulating debt and throwing away your money. Gambling is a horrible addiction and we all think we can win big and all our problems will be over. As you say it is just a pipe dream and I am glad that you are realizing that. Your baby is not a pipe dream, but one of the most precious gifts you will be given. Unfortunately even though we decide to stop gambling the thoughts and urges will come, and when they do and you feel like gambling, take a look at your baby and ***** your blessings. You deserve a gamble free life and your baby deserves a daddy that is there for them. One day at a time is all we have to focus on!!!One day at a time my sweet lord…5 August 2013 at 7:02 pm #9346
Well done Bryan. It takes a long long time to reduce debt but every time we gamble we add to that debt and frustrate ourselves more and more.
I’m hanging in this month!
Do or die!6 August 2013 at 5:02 pm #9347
Today is 1 week. There have been ***** where that is an accomplishment. Right now it isn’t as much. My schedule doesn’t allow me to gamble everyday. I would typically play twice a week. The thing is today I don’t want to gamble. Everytime I type here is a reminder gambling hurt me, and won’t help me. This path will help me.
Bryan7 August 2013 at 6:03 pm #9348
Last night was a little rough for me. Not with urges to play poker, but I was *****. It wasn’t fair to my family that I let a **** that probably stems from me losing money affect their night. It wasn’t anything terrible, but still not necessary. As for today, I will not gamble. I will strive to have a better day than yesterday.
Bryan8 August 2013 at 6:58 pm #9349
Just typing to keep not gambling fresh in my head. Today I will not place a bet. Had a couple rough **** swings, but time heals
Bryan9 August 2013 at 12:13 am #9350
keep focussed Bryan!
You are not alone!
Gambling sucks!12 August 2013 at 12:04 am #9351
I made it through the weekend without any urges. I’ve been contemplating a lot of things in my life recently. Mostly thinking of where gambling has taken my life. Is it to late to make things right? I know it’s not, but sometimes it feels like it is.
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