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    • #53380
      Seanraj4731
      Participant

      Good day all
      I am 37 currently on 91 days vacation here in Trinidad and Tobago. On December 5 2019 i have gambled and lost over $6000 on roulette machines and these machine are everywhere you go in the street corners bars casinos etc even right next door to where i live there is one. I have been struggling to stop gambling over a period of time and i find myself going again. i am facing a demon head on and i am gonna win this battle. i am gonna conquer this monster in my mind. Today Friday 06th December 2019 I am going keep this
      journal. It is a downward spiral that i am facing my wife is fed up and she decided she had enough and she filed for divorce. now i am left alone to fend for myself.
      I will be losing my son to this horrible addiction. yes we tried therapy counseling etc. never remained committed and it failed. Now I see myself in this trap
      not wanting to leave the house to go anywhere. My wife was fed up of all the lies and stealing I did over the years in that destructive addiction. i understand how
      she feels yet I am compel to go and gamble next door at that roulette machine. I admit i have a gambling problem. I admit It is a weakness. its has power and the
      mind cannot with stand it. I have been faced with alot of words that breaks my spirit and it feels like there no hope for me. I observe the way gambling does to
      myself as it pertains to health and wellbeing. Heart diseases and diabetic problem are on a rise. I have not distracted myself away from gambling I need help in
      those areas like a child i need someone to pull me out of this rut. Yes I am 37 but the mind feels to be a child to help myself to overcome this. I will stay on this forum
      and be thankful for the comments made.

    • #185954
      Seanraj4731
      Participant

      Today 21st December 2023
      Four years ago this journal help levitate the mind from crazing the habit. Yes still free from it all. Very thankful for the support received from this website. This gambling element has many in a trance where the mind is no longer ur best friend but ur worse nightmare. The destructive manner had it become the joy it took of life whereas to fabricate stories to lure ppl in feeding u the fuel to continue fulfilling the urges. Yes the mind had a big role to play when it is hooked on this habit. 4 yrs and 15days free.always giving thanks

    • #185961
      kin
      Participant

      Congratulations on the 4 years gamble free time!

    • #186081
      sarahluna88
      Participant

      I’m happy to hear that 😊👍👍👍

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