[paul315]

Last night I told my daughter about my joining Gamblers Anonymous and my activities here on Gambling Therapy. She has know of my "attraction" to gambling for a while and I have even borrowed money from her with the explicit reason to cover some bad checks I wrote at the casino, but my announcement seamed to surprise her a little, with her saying that she did not realize that my gambling was that bad (we can hide it from many, and even ourselves, before we decide to stop the deceit).  She also was extremely happy that I was doing something, leaving me to believe that she did know of or suspected my compulsion.
I have also told my brother and my sister of my problem, plus my other brother has known for awhile. They show concern but we are not close enough for me to feel any support. When I did tell my one brother he indirectly, and unintentionally, gave me more support then he, or I at the time, realized.  I had also asked him for money, with the explicit reason to cover another check I wrote for gambling.  When I asked, I knew that he would not give it to me so I guess I was actually seeking real help.  As expected, he did not give me any money, he also did not give me any support but rather belittled me telling me how week I was.  This truth helped awaken me to my dilemma and accept my compulsion and my personal responsibility to stop it.
After reading a post by  paul1day, and like him, I would like to say "that my post are for me", so forgive me if I seam to carry on.  This is not to say that I am not seeking your help, I read these post all the time and, again paraphrasing paul1, "graciously accept all the help I receive here"  and deeply appreciate your comments that give me further insight, help and encouragement.
Thank you and bless you all.Larry, aka Paul315"Day Two is Still a Day Away" – No matter how long in the program, I realize that without help and strength I might have to, but hopefully not, begin a new Day Two from time to time.

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