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  • #2329
    marlene
    Participant

    Been years since I posted.    Honestly, I wanted to hide away from all things, people, posts, advice, concerning gambling.  Had had enough.    Big health issue put everything on back burner.    What it also did was fear for my child’s future.  I say ‘child’.  No matter how old we get or our child gets, that bond is so dear and so close.      I feared that I would never see my child recovered and that I would die before then.    How sad is that.   Every mother’s nightmare I guess.    Surely it must be easier to walk away from a partner than a child.   
    Well, my child, my adult child, lapsed again last year.   Dont know how many lapses there were before then.    We had taken our foot off the gas and no longer had any control over finances – cards, etc.    Thought everything was ok.    How foolish is that.   There was so much going on in my own life.    I took it as read that everything was ok.
    Now it is the turn of GA to take over. It is to this organisation that my adult child returns to and places faith in it to help. Understanding this addiction has defeated me.    But is GA enough.   Does it offer a forum to dig deeper into issues that underlie this addiction.    Or is it that some people never become aware of what causes this emotional disease.    It is a wonderful organisation with a good track record and I am not belittling it.
    There is so much to tell.   But I am too tired just now.  Just glad I have found some courage to post.
    Love to all those who may remember me.   xx Marlene
     
     

    #2330
    Dunc
    Keymaster

     
    Hey Marlene, It’s great that you found the courage to post. Im sure no one from GA will take offence at your question.
    It’s a hard question to answer almost impossible. I have many friends who live a life of recovery purely down to GA, some 16 years and some 30 years clean.. It can & does work
    For me, I went to GA and it wasn’t enough, As you maybe aware I went into rehab which has proved its worth.
    The only person that can really say GA is enough is someone who embraces GA, if however there are issues that GA cannot deal with then there is counselling available, a Mix of GA & Counselling is a powerful tool
    But the only person that can truly answer this is the gambler themselves, we know in our hearts if we need more, we know if we are trully commited.. no one can say it for us
    Take Care & please keep posting
    Harry25 year poker player, 25 year Hierarchal fool, 25 year ego boost…  Intellectualisation was my down fall, simplicity was my salvation

    #2331
    looby loo
    Participant

    Hi Marlene, Of course I remember you, and sadly mine is much a same tale. An adult child who has not yet recognised he ***** constant support, even after going through GH !!! We will be here to support whenever you want to post. Time to look after YOU now, and let those adult children find their way. It is YOU that is important, remember that. Sending much love and friendship to you xxxWe must look forward and must never look back, we cannot change what has already happened. The future is brighter.Looby Loo

    #2332
    velvet
    Moderator

     
    Dear Marlene
    You know I would remember you. I am so proud of you posting again, I know it isn’t easy.
    GA can work and does for many, many people. 
    Dear Marlene – leave your foot off the gas and look after you and your husband.   You know all there is to know about enablement and you probably do everything right as a way of life now.  Have a look at our Friends and Family topic forum underneath this forum, if you need reminding about enablement but I’m sure you don’t.    You did all there was to do for your son and he was aware of the sadness he caused you.   He wouldn’t want you to feel that sadness and I am sure that and a desire to be gamble-free is why he is going to GA.  
    We can ask no more of our sons Marlene, than to be aware, to seek recovery and to look after themselves.   Your son is doing all of those things.  
    You say there is so much to tell and I hope you will write again soon.   
    Velvet xx 
     
      Velvet

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