Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 20 total)
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  • #7627
    Kimura
    Participant

    Hi,
    I just lost all I could ever loose: All the money I have in my bank I have lost. I couldn’t have lost more, that is 1700 euros, in the last 2 weeks. If I had more money, I think I would have played with them, without stopping before like winning 3000 euros or loosing them all.
    I lost 800 euros on casino blackjack (land based of course), and about 900 on online poker (pokerstars).

    I started gambling five years ago, when I was 22, very naive at the time, when I lost nearly 1000 euros on roulette and my beloved family supplied me immediately with money. I made an oath at that time never to gamble again before I get my diploma. Then I was aware at the fact that gambling, whatever you gamble on, you are mathematically in a disadvantage situation so I never gambled again… For three years. Last year, I fell on a website that explains how someone could be an advantage player in poker, that it is possible to make money out of poker, so I started playing. At that time, playing with 5 euros was a significant amount of money for me… I ended up this year playing with 400/ 600 euros on the table. 50 euros is like nothing… although in real life it means something to me.

    I also count cards in blackjack, and I am real good at it (home training without any mistakes). I never bet big unless I have an advantage, but when I bet big, I bet really really big (200 euros on average). I know that I could loose but I say I would have gambled with an advantage. I never play slots, unless to bet one cent at a time, waiting for the blackjack or poker tables to be open. It’s been more than a year that I visit casinos, never lost big on slots. The problem is loosing in poker, where it is possible to win… BUT, PRACTICALLY, I loose more than I win because of playing too much high stakes for me, which makes me nervous in taking my decisions, especially after a loss. The last 400 euros I lost were in pot limit omaha, I was 3 to 1 underdog, and that was because I was nervous playing.

    End of the story, I SHOULD absolutely stop gambling. But I know that I took this decision before and started gambling again. Honestly, I think this could happen again. I am very worried that this would happen again when I will have much more to loose (money, family, etc).

    What can I do?

    #7628
    Mred321
    Participant

    It is not easy to stop .But at least you know you have a problem.First thing I would do is give all your money,credit cards and checks to someone you can trust and tell them not to give you money under any conditions except for small amounts that you may need for that one day. You are doing the right thing seeking help for your addiction. I have tried many times to stop myself it is not easy.Have you tried Gamblers anonymous website to look for meeting where you live at. I go to one every week it takes 90 minutes to get there. But it helps save my sanity and to make it through another week.

    #7629
    Dunc
    Keymaster

    <

    Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

    Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

    Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

    And on that note….

    I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

    Take care

    The Gambling Therapy Team

    PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our

    privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    #7630
    Kimura
    Participant

    Thks everyone.
    I don’t think anybody should say “it’s not easy to stop”. It’s like taking away the responsibility we have gambling. It could become an addiction, but there’s some responsibility involved.
    Don’t take your credit card to the casino. Don’t take too much cash. Play small stakes. Don’t go the casino at all!!!

    And giving your money to some people is very humiliating. I think you should find a solution with your bank. When someone is deeply convinced he should stop, I think he will. You have no physical addiction like smoking for example. It’s only psychological.

    As for myself I will stop for 2 years at least until I pass my competitive score in 2 years which will be very important for my life. Afterwards I will what can I do.

    #7631
    charles
    Moderator

    Hi Kimura and welcome to the forum.

    “Don’t take your credit card to the casino. Don’t take too much cash. Play small stakes. Don’t go the casino at all!!!”

    Only one of those things is an option in reality don’t you think? The first 3 are all about controlling our gambling and if that worked then I doubt we would be here in the first place.

    When it comes to our cash having somone holding it need not be humiliating. How humiliated do we feel when peole see us giving it all to the casnio? If we become accountable, so that we can’t gamble, then we are not really giving someone control of our money, we are regaining it as of course we have little control when we are gambling.

    #7632
    Kimura
    Participant

    Charles,
    I didn’t feel a lot humiliated when I lost 800 at blackjack in front of strangers although it seemed that it was a big amount of money for me. I will feel humiliated in front of my friends. Am I inferior to them? Happily I am not at this point of the addiction.

    But, Imagine casino people will be laughing at you, saying to you you’re a stupid gambler, and that they’re happy that you’re there because you’re a sucker. Without changing their games. Would you go there again? If all of them did the same, would you continue gambling? Although that’s what they think. Someone should be a little bit intelligent and have minimal will to stop gambling. Even if it’s an addiction, I believe anybody could stop.

    #7633
    Kimura
    Participant

    The only thing that’s difficult for me to stop gambling is because I studied so well poker and blackjack, I am a very good card counter, that I don’t want all this knowledge of mine to be useless. But experience showed that I failed to “enjoy” gambling” and went into excessive betting. And in poker I am an underdog although I know how to play well, but play too much high stakes, that I decide under pressure.

    Otherwise it is easy for me not to bet a single dollar on casino games. Put me in some casinos around here, where they don’t have poker and they have machine shuffling for blackjack, I could stay there day and night for one week loosing no more than 20 euros, if not less than 5 euros. I may bet here and there for excitement and discovery, but won’t be gambling compulsively.

    I think I have more of a decision to make than “healing” my gambling addiction.

    #7634
    charles
    Moderator

    I hope you make the right decision for you then kimura.

    Maybe take a look at the 20 questions they have on the Gamblers Anonymous website? Whether or not anyone actually decides to go to GA the questions are still relevant and should help you make your decision.

    http://www.gamblersanonymous.org/ga/content/20-questions

    Maybe also start a thread in the My Journal forum, whatever your decision you can keep a track of your progress there and let us know how you get on.

    #7635
    charles
    Moderator

    Maybe as you make that decision also reread the post you started with here, made less than a week ago. It was titled “How to stop gambling” and told us how you had lost everything.

    This is a progressive addiction so the choice we all have to make is whether to address it now or wait until things get worse.

    #7636
    Mred321
    Participant

    Kimura….I have also thought I could control my gambling at one time…I have tried many times to bet only a few dollars but after a while I would stay awake at night trying to figure a way to get more money… it is a long slippery slope my friend…its starts off slow at first then the need for excitement takes over and you think the next big win is coming, and yes it may happen but you will think you can win more. But in the end the money from the big win will be gone. Yes you may be able to count cards very well. But ask your self how did that work so far? As for giving my money to another person. That works very well for me when I get the itch to have some fun.Then if I do something bad I only lose a few dollars. may you find your way my friend before its too late

    #7637
    peacegirl
    Participant

    The problem is stopping is not as easy as just saying, okay now I am going to stop gambling. The excitement, the glitz, the winning, the “fun” and thrill of being there will creep back into your mind and until you realize it’s an out and addiction that requires much more work then just saying, I quit gambling for good- then you will continue to gamble. How do I know this, I have been there done that for years! I thought I could just stop many times, and many times I did- but when we think we are higher then the problem itself we fall flat on our face every time! So for me, I am a compulsive gambler and I now live ODAAT and for today I am not gambling… I try now not to look ahead to never gambling again, and I will remember the horrid mistakes and money I lost, but I will try not too look too much back either! Hope you can realize we are here on this site because we need each other, perhaps outside help and most of all we need to fully admit we have a problem…

    #7638
    Kimura
    Participant

    Peacegirl,
    Well, I don’t think you’re here to help. What do you mean by that? Someone could have a problem, yes, but will is very powerful, and prayer. It includes studying the games, etc… Do you know at least the odds of the games you play at??

    #7639
    charles
    Moderator

    Peacegirl and Mredhave given you some good advice here Kimura, people are sharing the things that have worked for them.

    The casinos aren’t the problem – as Compulsive Gamblers, and scoring 10 or 11 yeses in those 20 questions suggests that includes yourself, we have the problem within us.

    That does not take responsibility for our actions away from us. Whilst being CGs the important thing is we KNOW we are CGs and that puts the responsibility squarely on our own shoulders to do something about it. Maybe take a look around the rest of that GA site and find a local meeting, there is a lot of support out there. Keep posting.

    #7640
    Kimura
    Participant

    Thks Charles,
    I would say casinos are a little bit for the problem. You didn’t notice how the slot machines miss the jackpot by little half of the time? This is meant to make people nervous and wanting to gamble more. I gambled on slots (1 cent per tour always) a lot, and that isn’t much to make the wheel spin for the jackpot. And I gambled a lot of time there (all my losses on slots combined would not exceed 20 euros in 2 years), waiting for table games to be open. I would say one out of four times when the jackpot wheel turned the gamblers next to me missed the jackpot just by little. Can you imagine? On a wheel with more than 20 prizes, one out of four times the wheel turns, the gambler gets the prize that is just next to the jackpot.

    Last time I gambled and lost the 800, I was so angry that I put the 4 euros into that machine and gambled them all. By the time, guess what? The wheel turned and I got the prize that’s just next to the jackpot.

    The intention of those who created those machines is not a very good one.

    #7641
    Chrisakoako
    Participant

    I have occasional urges to gamble but it is very destroying to me and my partner who is a non gambler so she does not understand at all what goes on in a mind set of a gamblers addiction my addiction is most of the time under control but I need to be in control and rid myself of this destructive obsession. I understand that a lot of people out there are a lot more addicted than me and my heart goes out to them. I am at the edge staring into the precipice and want to pul myself way back from that. I am a foster carer for ten or more years now and love helping children to overcome there own problems and sometimes your own problem get left unnoticed prayers to us all chris.

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