6 March 2013 at 4:20 pm #2360
That is not the update I wanted to hear and never could be.
Looking for positives – you are right he has not gone underground and you are not left wondering if…..
He is aware of what he has to do and you are right, highlighting that his behaviour is the cause of his situation is a waste of your energy – far better spent living your life.
I know that regardless of what you say, this will have affected you somewhat because you are not hard. It is another disappointment for you but probably an on-going one for him.
Go on holiday and have a ball – your son is choosing to follow his idea of having a good time and he must be the one to carry his burden further.
I am glad you were able to have a conversation where you were able to remind him that he ***** to commit his life to being gamble-free or his sad state will carry on – somewhere, sometime the messsage will reach the point that other messages seem to have missed because he didn’t want to hear them.
You are standing firm which is the best thing you can do for your son – he has to make ‘his’ choice in his time.
V6 March 2013 at 10:03 pm #2361moniqueParticipant
I am sorry that you have had this experience.
This is another tough one for you and it must hurt.
But, as you say, you are carrying on with your own life and plans. And you have seen some positives in the way your son has been dealing with things this time. You will not let this pull you down.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your story.
Stay strong – I know you will. And I wish you all the best for your Anniversary and holiday. Enjoy it to the full!!
Love, Monique xx
Keep hope alive.8 May 2013 at 7:14 pm #2362veraParticipant
You must be looking forward to the new arrival Looby! let us know when he/she gets here!– 08/05/2013 21:24:00: post edited by vera.7 June 2013 at 12:37 pm #2363
Just tried to catch up a little with you, there are bits of you all over the place !! I gather things have been mixed for you and just wanted to leap out of the undergrowth and let you know I have thought about you and hope that life is a little more settled of late. Now i’m going to try and find Monique as she too seems to have done one !!
Jenny xWe see things not as they are, but through how we are today x8 June 2013 at 11:39 am #2364looby looParticipant
Thanks for asking about me, how are you doing ?
Things have definitely been up and down, but the gambling episode hasn’t affected us really, we have been far to busy with other stuff and its not our problem. Son did come to his uncle’s funeral and has seen his new nephew too, at only a week old.
In answer to your questions V, I don’t know how long the abstinence was, I don’t know what support he has (probably none) I believe it was a ‘full blown’ and yes his barriers have to go up again and he knows it ………………………….. Our grandson is gorgeous and our time and thoughts have been with the kids and our sister in law. So sorry to read you have been unwell, hope you are feeling tip top again now ?
Son due to visit next weekend again, we are away with grandaughter Tuesday until Saturday and will catch up with him when we are back……………………..
I have finished working for the charity, as it was running out of funding, but was asked to do some medical typing at our local hospital on Mon/Tues each week, that, combined with helping with the kids, seeing my own friends and upkeep of our home certainly keeps me more than occupied – how ever did I manage to work full time ????
I do read every day, but of course don’t always have the time to post as much as I used to, but I do think about all my friends here on a very regular basis – where are you Monique ?????
Everyone has a destiny, it's up to us whether we choose to follow it though !Looby Loo11 June 2013 at 4:04 pm #2365
I am glad you are having your hands kept full with good things which help stop the bad things taking up room in your head.
I hope the ‘gambling episode’ was just that for you – an episode in your book of life that you have been reading for a long time. It is easier I think for you to turn the page now because you know the book will continue regardless of the storm in the last chapter. Chapters with grandchildren and friends will follow on now and lighten your heart. I sincerely hope to hear soon that your son decides to give himself a better chance in life and embrace recovery.
It is so sad to hear how much damage some CGs seem to have to inflict on themselves before they realise that the only way forward to is to take the difficult route of recovery and total absinence. Your son has certainly ducked and dived his way round that path for some time but each hurt he has caused himself does add up.
I know he can change but he is still seemingly immature. The fact that his family are moving on, growing in stature and refusing his addiction in their lives, could not be a greater incentive to him.
I wondered if you were still reading.
16 December 2013 at 6:55 pm #2366bonkersParticipant
sorry to here your sons lapse,but he will make it in the end,you are inspiration to me,and im sure he will come through to be the son you want him to be,have a lovely xmas and a prosperous new year. best wishes bonkers and family17 December 2013 at 10:30 am #2367
I’ve been wondering how things are going for you ? these days I am not here so often and when I have been i have not succeeded in posting, I have the IT skills of a knat at times !! I too hope that you have a better year ahead and above all a peaceful one x
Jenny17 December 2013 at 11:23 am #2368
I am not sure that Bonker’s post is accurate. I suspect this an old thread and I feel it is not right to start surmising on Looby’s son’ rcovery. If Looby is reading of course we wish her a happy Christmas and maybe she can give us an accurate update.17 March 2014 at 6:47 pm #2369bonkersParticipant
hi looby loo,just a few lines to say,went to a great show on sat with Lesley.it was lets hang on,atribute to f valli and four sessons, it was fantastic,if you get a chance you must go,i know like me you love your music,not heard from you for a whike,hope all is well,best wishes bonkers22 April 2014 at 8:45 pm #2370looby looParticipant
I have just posted on your thread. I still read from time to time but not as often as I used to, but have been able to have a good catch up this evening. Cant believe it has been so long since I posted on the site. Glad you enjoyed the F Valli tribute we have been to a few concerts/shows recently and are going to see Steve Harley in Manchester on Saturday. Life is very busy here looking after the wee ones now daughter is back at work, but loving every minute of it. Catch ya again soon. Loobs x22 April 2014 at 9:06 pm #2371
Just thought i’d impose on your reply to Bonkers, Glad to read that life’s busy, I too still read but not so often ! I guess there comes a time when we move on for better or worse ( no marriage on the horizon!!!)
Glad I came here tonight and saw your post, Have often wondered how you are xx
The fairies are still with you I take it ??
Jenny x23 April 2014 at 8:25 am #2372AnonymousGuest
Reaally nice to read your post Looby, during my abscence I did visit the site and noticed you hadnt been posting, I thought you’d “left”.
Sorry my tale wasnt a tale of continued success for you to read but one day at a time I will progress through life. As far as recovery goes each day without gambling is a success. Just for today I won’t be gambling and thats a big enough commitment for me.
Enjoy your hols.
Geordie 🙂23 April 2014 at 10:57 pm #2373veraParticipant
Great to meet you in the chat yesterday Looby!
Hope your son enjoys the holiday with the family!
The break will be good for all of you!2 May 2014 at 4:01 pm #2374moniqueParticipant
Just saying Hi to you Looby. I still think of you and your family and send you all my best wishes,
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