[catewishes]

I adore my husband, he is the love of my life and my very best friend. But he gambles, compulsively and has done since, we’ll since forever. In the last 3 years I have stood by him though he has stolen from the children, friends and family. I have had bailiffs at the door, I have had bank accounts closed and now no one will give me one. He lies to me about where he is or is going, he lies to me about where money has gone. He disappears all the time to fetch an item from the shop that we don’t need and takes 3 hours to do shopping that takes an hour tops. He gets so angry all the time. He shouts, he stamps his fists, he yells at the kids and he accuses us of things we haven’t done. He is never wrong and storms out of the house if things don’t go his way. I am exhausted. I have hidden it all from the kids and my family. My friends are few and far between. I have sorted dr appointments, therapy, hypnotherapy and been with him supporting him every time. He goes a couple of times and then says it doesn’t work. He is like two different people and when he is in an even keel he is amazing (otherwise u would have left years ago). He can be kind, romantic, loving and funny but the other side of him is so awful to live with. In January I gave him an ultimatum. I put together a big box of stuff that could help him along with photos and tel numbers and a letter I wrote about how I felt. I told him I wouldn’t put up with it anymore and this was his last chance. He has hardly looked at it, he tried hypnotherapy once but didn’t like it so gave up. He has since gambled a lot of money away, lied and lied and lied. The last couple of days have been hell. We argued on Saturday and I told him to leave. He got very angry and stormed out only to come back later and say he wouldn’t leave. Then we talked and he apologised and said he would sort things out. Then yesterday he gambled away our last £90. We have no petrol, will need food this week and my daughter cannot have her guitar lesson tonight. He is angry with all of us. The kids are nervous. I love him to death and feel numb at the moment. Do I leave now? He says he feels suicidal, which he has said loads of times. Where do I go? Do I give him another chance? Do I summon up my strength now and leave? I am heartbroken and confused. Fairy tale endings

[Dunc]

 
Hi Katewishes
Thank you for posting on the Gambling Therapy forum. As you are a GB resident you are entitled to free online support through the Gamcare website at http://www.gamcare.org.uk/ .
 
Can I suggest that you now copy and paste your post into one of the Gamcare forums where you will receive responses from others in a similar situation to you from all over Great Britain.
You can also access online or face to face group support through Gamblers Anonymous:
http://www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk/
We wish you well in your recovery.
Kind Regards
The Gambling Therapy Team25 year poker player, 25 year Hierarchal fool, 25 year ego boost…  Intellectualisation was my down fall, simplicity was my salvation

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