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  • #6212
    rednita
    Participant

    boyfriend is going to ga.   But I don’t think he is working the program.  He has not set up any safe guards, hasn’t paid me back and is holding to pay checks…which concerns me.  He doesn’t want anyone to include my mother who lives with us to know about his gambling.  He is moody about my mood swings almost mad cause I’m a wreck worrying about this mess.  He seems not to understand my panic when he’s late coming home or doesn’t answer his phone.  

    Im glad he’s going to ga but I don’t think its enough just going to the meeting once a week.  He says he’s reformed.. It’s only be 45 days maybe.

    meanwhile I’m still paying for everything and he’s holding his checks and driving my car.  

    I told him that I couldn’t enable him, cover for him and my mother who lives with me should be aware, yjat I couldnt lie for him, lend him cash…that he should make arrangements for cash management and put up barriers.  That I loved him and I hope he knew that.

    his response was “not really if you think you need to protect your mother from me. “

    I cry for no reason …I guess I was in denial about how bad this thing is and now that I know I want him to fight…and he’s just going with the flow.

    i love him but I obviously can’t trust him…he can’t trust himself really….what do I Do?  

    How do I keep it together…. Do I tell him to leave, do I wait and see…

    He says he loves me… Why can’t he understand or care how hurt, lost and scared I am ? 

    Why am I mess when he is not? 

     

    #6213
    velvet
    Moderator

    Hello Rednita

    Thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy friends and family forum. This forum will provide you with warmth and understanding from your peers.

    Feel free to use the friends and family group, you’ll find the times for these if you click on the “Group times” box on our Home page

    Read about the friends and Family Online Groups

    Now that you have introduced yourself you’ll find that many of the people you meet here have already read your initial introduction and they’ll welcome you in like an old friend 🙂

    If you’re the friend or family member of someone who is either in, or has been through, the GMA residential programme please take extra care to make sure that nothing you say in groups, or on our forums, inadvertently identifies that person. Even if your loved one isn’t connected with GMA, please don’t identify them either directly or indirectly just in case they decide to use the site themselves.

    You’ll find a lot of advice on this site, some of which you’ll follow, some you won’t…but that’s ok because only you fully understand your
    situation and what’s best for you and the people you love. So, take the support you need and leave the advice you don’t because it all comes from a caring, nurturing place 🙂

    We look forward to hearing all about you!

    Take care

    The Gambling Therapy Team

    PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our
    privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    #6214
    velvet
    Moderator

    Hi Rednita
    Well done writing your post, the first one is never easy.
    I will reply to you asap
    Velvet

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