21 May 2018 at 4:51 am #6284aellisParticipant
Hello, my name is Angelica. My boyfriend of three years has a gambling problem. It took me a year and a half to realize it and it’s taken me another year to realize that he isn’t and hasn’t ever been in control of it and has no desire to stop. It is so hard and so lonely, I spend many nights like tonight unable to sleep crying nonstop because I’m stuck here alone. I feel unwanted because he can so easily drop everything and leave. Sometimes he leaves straight from work and doesn’t come back until after I left for work at 4am. I have to bring my daughter with me to work because he isn’t home to watch her. Then he’ll call in sick to work, sleep the entire day and then wake up in the evenings and go back. When we plan date night, I’ll ask where we are going and he won’t give me a definitive answe. He’ll be talking on his cell phone and start driving. By the time he hangs up we are halfway to the casino, ”I thought maybe we’ll play a little bit. Is that ok?” Desperate to spend time with him I reluctantly agree and sit there while he ignores me. I can’t even get him to talk to me while he’s playing. By the the time we get home it’s 3am EVERY TIME! Need I remind you I leave for work at 4am! This makes me feel like he has no respect for my work. While he lies and tells everyone hes taking me out for dinner and shopping he’s at the casino. Meanwhile he doesn’t answer my texts or phone calls. I pay almost all the bills and he makes literally 6x what I make! All he pays for is rent. If I don’t pay it the eletric gets shut off and we don’t get to have cable. All his mail lays unopened on the counter, debt collectors call for him all day. I feel like weeks go by and I don’t see him. I love him so much… we were supposed to get married in 2 years. I just want to be loved and respected, I don’t understand why he’s like that and I feel like its all my fault. I don’t want to leave him, I don’t want to take my daughter away from the only father she’s ever known. I’ve been homeless before and I don’t want to go through that again. I have no family, and I don’t make enough money on my own for rent plus everything else I already pay for. I feel so hopeless and alone.21 May 2018 at 9:05 am #6285DuncKeymaster
Thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy friends and family forum. This forum will provide you with warmth and understanding from your peers.
Feel free to use the friends and family group, you’ll find the times for these if you click on the “Group times” box on our Home page
Read about the friends and Family Online Groups
Now that you have introduced yourself you’ll find that many of the people you meet here have already read your initial introduction and they’ll welcome you in like an old friend 🙂
If you’re the friend or family member of someone who is either in, or has been through, the GMA residential programme please take extra care to make sure that nothing you say in groups, or on our forums, inadvertently identifies that person. Even if your loved one isn’t connected with GMA, please don’t identify them either directly or indirectly just in case they decide to use the site themselves.
You’ll find a lot of advice on this site, some of which you’ll follow, some you won’t…but that’s ok because only you fully understand your situation and what’s best for you and the people you love. So, take the support you need and leave the advice you don’t because it all comes from a caring, nurturing place 🙂
We look forward to hearing all about you!
The Gambling Therapy Team
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