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    • #53667

      Everyday I wake up and say today is the day I do no gambling, and everyday its the same result, I gamble. I am not sure what happened to me and where it all started but I placed my first bet in college. I dont even know why
      I did it but I did and I lost. That was 15 years ago. I think about it all the time, if I would have never had made that bet, would I be the disaster that I am today? I have done every form of gambling there is since, and I have done some things
      to help me get away from it. I have barred myself from the casino for starters, something I was really proud of. But then I found other ways to gamble. I felt empty without the noises and the rush, but I feel empty with the noises and the
      rush as well. I chased for 15 years and can’t even imagine how much in the hole I am. I have been so frustrated with myself lately that I wonder things I shouldn’t wonder. Like would my family be better off without so they dont have to
      deal with what I do? Maybe I can let my wife live a life without that around her. But I look at her and say I could never be without her and I want to become a better man. Gambling aside I am a great husband and great father. Im always there
      but I put so much time and effort into gambling it puts burdens on my relationships that I wish I could mend. I have the desire to quit if I could forget about my losses, but that tends to get in the way of really quitting. I am going to try my
      hardest this time to actually quit, for the sake of my marriage, my kids, and myself. I want to become somebody that people look up too, not look at and wonder if I am scheming another gamble. I want to be able to look my wife in the eyes
      and tell her I havent gambled and it actually be true. I will check in daily with a report of if I successfully made it through a day and things I did to stay away from gambling. So here’s to day 1, I know its going to be hell, but I want nothing more
      than to quit!

    • #53668

      Hello brother
      I am happy to meet you. I am Sean. I would encourage you to stay on this road to recovery you made your first bold step in ths right direction being on this website on this platform to help not only yourself but others to recovery. I am on my third day free frm gambling. I lost my family becuz of wife recently broke it off with me. Anyways enof with my self pity i say this to point out everyone is here for one goal and that is to be free from it all. Be normal again as you say. Yes i was real normal back before i made that first bet. I was active doing courses studying doing my degree saving money investing in money market growth and income funds i had it going. Got married have a son he is 7 nw and things was going good. Then it all came crashing when i made that first bet won that first bet the thrill of winning. Wow i felt good at that time. Now we move forward onward to win this battle to take back control over the mess we made we shall stand stromg and be grateful to those who stood with us in the fight. Thank you brother for staying strong. Be positive. Look forward to your progress.

    • #53669

      You say I know it is going to be hell.
      Yes stopping isn’t easy, especially if you are doing this every day – but it is possible. I am around 10 years without gambling, someone else recently celebrated 16 years.

      I only really stopped when I made a decision to treat my recovery as seriously as I treated my gambling. In other words every day I lived and breathed “not gambling” and doing things that would help with that.

      Banning yourself is a great first step – but if you have the means to gamble then you will. So cut of the means. Talk to your wife about her handling your finances for a time until you feel strong enough to take them back. No access to money – no betting. Also see if she will take part in this site as well. Read or post on the families and friends part of the site or speak to someone in the facilitated groups. The more insight she gets into your problem the more she can help and also get support for herself going through this.

      Also get great support for yourself. See if there are any self-help groups like GA in your area or talk to someone about counseling. I was struck by, “I felt empty without the noises and the rush, but I feel empty with the noises and the rush as well.” So where is this emptiness coming from? Possibly talking to a counselor would help with this.

      In the early days I would throw everything at your recovery and then you can lessen this once the urges become fewer and you begin to settle into your new non-gambling life. I wish you well.

    • #53670

      Hello Kwintz and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

      Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

      Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

      As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

      And on that note….

      I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

      Take care

      The Gambling Therapy Team

      PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    • #53671

      Sean, thank you for responding. im sorry youre going through what you are.  Your response was really inspiring and I will keep fighting. 

    • #53672

      hi steev 

      thank you for reaching out to me. I am into counseling and I definitely appreciate your support. I’ve been working towards doing the right things, and I’m doing good So far.  Like you said throwing everything at it like I have at gambling is something I’ve really been focusing on.  Confratulations on 10 years, that’s so awesome.  Hearing that from someone gives me hope.  I appreciate it. 

    • #53673

      Good day i am thankful for your response i do applaud you for getting help and in return you will help others in a familiar situations. Continue to stay positive.” Why do something over and over still expecting a different result. ” use this quote and applied it to gonna make it happen being happy. Freedom from it all. You gonna rise above this.

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