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For the past 10 months or so I’ve been like a moth to a flame. Flirting with slot machines. I should KNOW better. I’ve been here before. I had 5 years without a bet. And one day while I was waiting for take out pizza in the same place as a sports bar with slot machines. My guard was down, I’d been thinking about it, I hadn’t been keeping up with meetings or coming here.
Because I have been so afraid of being caught gambling I’ve limited my gambling to small amounts of time fit in amongst regular errands. Although I have not caused financial damage YET……. I find the words MORALLY BANKRUPT going through my mind. Lying, sneaking about, betraying the trust of my family that I have rebuilt in the past 5 years. So today I’m posting in hopes of getting back on track. I know what needs to be done. I need some accountability. I am here to be honest about my problem. It has never gone away. Nor will it ever. I just can’t stand the thought of dissapointing my family again. Today would normally be a gambling day for me. I have to run to the city for an appointment. I need to be strong. Thanks for listening.
Laura