[trish12]

Hello everyone…I have been on this site for awhile mainly reading and participating in some chats..there r two sites as well that I visit quite regularly.
So a bit about me….my gambling spanned about 16yrs sometimes crazy sometimes absentiness for months at a time. I maily played video keno and bingo.My gambling became intense after a life changing event that shattered me.I found being in the casino took away the pain and allowedme to forget for awhile..and I would win and in those cash out.
As the years passed by gambling began to consume evry thought,every action..it was my fulltime partner and we had a satisfying relationship or so I thought.
Many times i left the casino broke…not paying bills and so and so forth.i eventually was caught by my family…and stoped telling them i would get help etc…my dad bailed me  out and of course I did not get help…just stayed away for awhile and was a more careful player.
I was smarter though I would pay the bills and then be broke till payday week in and week out.    Almost 2 yrs ago dec 20th to be exact because of family issues I needed to get a day job with regular days off…I am a nurse and as you we work all sorts of crazy hrs.well I did find the perfect job but no more extra shifts or no where near as many and very little overtime…but my bills were still the same…so gambling really started to hurt the pocket book and i was feeling the pain financially…i began to credit seek…using some of the money for debt reduction but lots for gambling.
I was on a downward spiral and I realized if I did not stop I would never recover financially and May15th of this yr I hit my rock bottom.I called the addictions foundation and they set up an appointment for me for the following week as told me about the other two sites I go to.
So I became gamblefree and thought i was doing great  and had a big crash Sept.12/12 which became a turning point in my recovery…I sucked all me fears about GA and went to my 1st meeting…it was awesome..felt like coming home…I atteend Ga regularly and am working the steps and making great friends..I am close to 90 days gamble free and love my new life.
as i recover i am learning about my character defects and working on them as well.The nurse in me causes me to care too much,toomget too involved and lose focus on my recovery.
so now recently I have started putting me and my recovery 1st..I limit my my chats to listening and offering a few suggestions but I have put more boundaries up to keep me safely in my zone of recovery.
looking forward to my time here…seems to be alot of awesome experience and knowledge here!! Thanx for reading!:)One moment at a time…

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