22 September 2023 at 10:43 am #181666nelynrc27Participant
Hi, my name is Nelyn I’m 38 years old, originally from Philippines and have been living abroad by myself since 2011. I used to be motivated, hardworking and very positive in life. Working abroad is not easy specially when you’re far away from family. But I grew up independent and likes challenges and learning new things. Work is tough trying to obtain permanent residency but I work hard to get it and support family back home. I used to send money back home and help my parents and siblings financially. Then I met a guy whom I had relationship for almost 5 years. I was so in love with this guy that I didn’t see reality. I’ve been supporting him and his young daughter at the time, I work 2 jobs. But I started to feel unwanted when he went to school, he said I cant see him everyday coz hes gonna be busy and need to focus. I literally live one block from his place. So I started going out with friends. And one time, I drove my friend to a pub, they wanted me to stay a little so I did. My girlfriend hand me $5 to put in VLT machine. I was so hesitant to gamble coz I never gamble before. And sure is the beginners luck, I won $90 . I cash it out right away. Days and days passed by, normal routine, but my relationship with boyfriend is getting worst, I was unhappy, and most friends are busy with their families. So i thought i needed to have fun. I was driving home from work and passed by a pub and I was tempted to play VLt. and it continues to go on couple days a week. Ive been winning and I have control. Then, winter time came and my work becomes slow, i dont get much tips as i used to. And i thought, maybe i should try to gamble and make some money. I was having fun and meeting friends so i thought its nice leisure for me. until i discover that casino is just 10 mins away from where i live. I spend a lot of hours in the casino. I wouldnt leave until its closing time. It came to a point when im winning big money like $10,000 and i wouldnt go home. I would end up putting back half of it. then comeback the next day chasing that money i lost. It become really bad that sometimes i would spend my whole paycheque in just couple hours. Then i started pulling out money from credit cards, loans and ask friends to transfer money. Its been really stressful and depressing going home empty pocket. And that’s the only time i would come to my senses and tell myself what have you done? then i have to figure out how to pay my bills coz i used all my paycheque gambling. and its a repeatitive process. When covid hits and casino closes, i was happy. i said oh atleast i cant come to casino even if i want to. but a friend introduces online gambling. and i get hooked to it and did the same thing. i did self exclusion for six months but i have a very strong urge to come play slots again. I tried to see if they will recognized me and i still can come play and even collect big winnings. I just couldnt control, i would set limit and still gamble more than what i planned for. Now, im so broke and couldnt catch up with bills. creditors are calling at my work, the amount of stress and anxiety is just beyond way i could handle. I lost trust of people i borrowed money from, and having conflicts with family. Im trying so hard to stop. But i would end up coming again.
22 September 2023 at 10:49 am #181698DuncKeymaster
Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
The Gambling Therapy Team
24 September 2023 at 4:15 pm #181753jvr3419Participant
Hi Nelyn welcome to the forums. You sound like your ready and that’s the first step to quitting any addiction. The best thing that worked for me when I started my recovery was I found a counselor that specialized in gambling addiction and trauma. I also have been involved in 12 step groups since I was younger so I had a sponsor and support from other addicts with other addictions. The connection with other like minded individuals is probably the only thing that’s ever helped me with any addiction I’ve ever had. People that understand how to fight it and what needs to be done to stay abstinent. It’s a hard road but it does start to get better I can promise that.
- This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by jvr3419.
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