23 May 2022 at 7:02 pm #155579acleanslate2022Participant
Here we go.
Im 30, a wife and mum to 2 kids. A hard-working professional and a compulsive gambler.
It all started during lockdown when I played a few online slots to pass the time, we all know how it goes, I had a massive win and the rest is history.
I am now sitting here in almost £70k worth of debt. Depressed, anxious and alone, unable to sleep at night and suffering with severe mood swings.
Tomorrow is my day 1. 1 day at a time, I feel empowered to overcome this and get myself and my family out of the financial hole I have put us in. I dont have a penny to my name, ive spent my families entire savings but never missed a payment. I saw gambling as a way of making money and acknowledge that the amount of debt is a massive trigger for me – I think I gambled to numb the pain of facing the situation head on.
I have registered for Gamstop and also emailed other online casinos not registered with Gamstop asking them to permanently self exclude me.
Any advice right now would be greatly appreciated, feeling very isolated and alone. Thanks.
23 May 2022 at 7:03 pm #155588
Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums. By posting to the forums you’re allowing the diverse and caring Gambling Therapy community to help support you through the difficulties you’re facing.
This may well be a tough time for you – particularly if you’re new to recovery, so we encourage you to post here as often as you need to, as well as making use of the online groups and the live advice helpline if you’d like some one-to-one support. We’re all in this together! If you’re a new member, you are warmly invited to join Charles in one of the New Members Practical Advice groups (Mondays at 21:00 UK Time and Thursdays at 19:00 UK Time).
The forum is a great place to share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. By writing it all down you can start to build a record of your progress that you can look back on – particularly useful if you’re ever feeling stuck. Share as much or as little as you like – but you’re encouraged to stick to keeping to just one thread in this forum – so people know where to find you to check in on your progress or to share something with you.
The Gambling Therapy staff team don’t generally post to the forums as it is a peer support area of the site – so we’ll hand you over to the community from here.
The Gambling Therapy Team
23 May 2022 at 7:26 pm #155589
Hi, and well done on looking for help. You are not alone with this problem. Read the other stories here and you will see a lot that you will relate to. You will also read the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?
Well done on registering wth Gamstop and excluding from those casinos. Another barrier you will read about is to do with the finances and accountability – your husband could help with that.
The debt was a trigger for you? Yes, it would have been. Though of course much of that debt was caused by gambling. This addiction does kid people that it can be the solution to our problems when it is of course the cause of most of them.
There is a lot of support available to you in the UK. Here of course where we have these forums, support groups and a 1 to 1 helpline. Gamcare is also an option – they offer free counselling. Gamblers Anonymous groups, even residential support. The important thing it to use help – if any of us could do it on our own then none of us would be here.
When it comes to the debts get some proper financial advice. Stepchange offer this advice free. https://www.stepchange.org/ There are lots of options these days – from bankruptcy through to repayment plans, with a lot in betwee, They will talk your options through with you and even write to your creditors on your behalf. When things are in place you can then just focus on the manageable weekly/monthly payment, it’s less daunting then and less likely to be a trigger than any big scary total.
Show your husband this site – there is also a Frends and Family forum where he can get support.
Keep posting and let us know the positie steps you are taking. The actions that will help you stop gambling are the same actions that can help rebuild trust etc.
26 May 2022 at 9:08 am #155590kingsbestzParticipant
My gambling addiction started from fun to something so serious, that I never pictured in this my whole life, I lost part of my life savings of about 150kUSD, to gambling in casino and virtual games, I can’t even breath well, I can’t sleep, I am depressed, I can’t even leave my normal social life, I can’t talk to loved ones and friends, I just want to be alone and think about my life.. Gambling have put me in a lot of mess, How can I cope now.. I can’t think straight anymore, please I need help for advice and also how to get this memory off my head, I want to picture it never happened.. Oh God, please forgive me 😢😢😢🙏🙏
26 May 2022 at 7:36 pm #155850
Hi Kinsbestz and welcome. I recommend starting your own thread here, you will get a lot of support and feedback. Read the other stories here, you will read a lot that you will elate to, you will also see the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation? You can stop gambling and rebuild things i promise you. Start your own thread and i will be able to give you some more advice. Or maybe I will see you in one of the support groups here.
29 May 2022 at 2:43 pm #156062LosingitslowlyParticipant
Hi acleanslate, and good that you are here. If you are online and have an issue with gambling electronically, then get gamban (or its equivalent) on all devices, and I mean all, that you may be able to gamble on. The urge to gamble will take you from one device to another. I had to eventually get it on 2 laptops, phone and iPad. Dont let your discomfort at the idea dissuade you from doing it either. I always felt that I should always have just one method available for when I could “control” my gambling at a later date. Funny, huh? I eventually would just lose control on all devices so I recommend doing it asap. It will help to curb the urges when you know that there is no way to give in. Come up with a plan to help stop putting yourself in harm’s way and share your plans and days with us. We are here to help and be helped by each other.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.