Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 88 total)
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  • #32796
    Steven187
    Participant

    Of course they aren’t interested.
    Perhaps they should be tho. It was 100% down to me, I’m fine with that, but someone gambling on the hour every hour regularly isn’t normal and that should be flagged up.
    You wouldn’t serve an alcoholic more booze. Why should this be any different?

    #32797
    vera
    Participant

    I asked that question many times, Steven.
    The only conclusion I came to , is that they show “token” concern in the form of Free Counselling, Gamaware programmes etc. That gets them off the hook and lulls the unfortunate donors (us!)into a false security.

    The only satisfaction we can get is to deprive the sleazy fatcats of our hard earned cash, from now on.
    I used to be VERY angry.
    The feeling has subsided now.
    “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference”!

    #32798
    Steven187
    Participant

    The bottom line is they do the bare minimum. There’s probably a legal requirement to have a nod to the various agencies who help problem gamblers. I remember being asked a series of questions on one site to try and determine if I was a problem gambler. My deposits/withdrawals and bets provided the answer. The amount I was betting was also a giveaway. The highest bet I had placed prior to Aug/Sep last year was £150, the highest I’ve placed to date is £13,000. They make it difficult enough to withdraw winnings due to security checks/proving identity etc, so why are there no questions asked when you deposit/gamble large amounts?

    I’m not overlooking the fact I have/had a problem, but perhaps these sites should have more of a duty of care.
    I’m clearly not alone in my experience/behaviour, so the same thing will happen again to others.

    #32799
    Steven187
    Participant

    I have no anger or resentment. What’s happened has happened and I’m dealing with it. This site has and will continue to be a big help, so thank you all who have posted.
    I really wouldn’t like what happened to me, to happen to others. The sad fact is that it will though.

    #32800
    theone12221
    Participant

    I think we can all agree that some of the “tactics” used by certain online casinos are unethical, such as delaying withdrawals and making it very difficult/repeatedly asking for ID docs. Obviously these delay tactics are to draw us in and lose it all. Unfortunately like you mentioned, the industry only does its bare minimum generally. Thankfully we have websites such as this one and gamcare.

    But its like with everything the main factor is our self-control. Even if an alcoholic gets kicked out (thats mostly for the safety of OTHERS), he can go to any liquor store and spend/buy as much as he wants. I know we play mostly online but a real casino slot machine cannot differentiate between who is feeding the machine money. Bottom line, we gotta take responsibility for our actions and deal with the expected consequences. There are countless things which are “unfair” or “too tempting but destructive” in this life and once we learn to implement self-control over our emotions, we can get back on track.

    #32801
    theone12221
    Participant

    I do note that I have noticed an improvement in responsible gambling for online sites recently (perhaps due to stricter legislation) such as deposit limits, gaming limits/time limits and flushing/quick withdrawals. Also I’ve noticed some sites even limit the max you can deposit per day (eg. 1k on a credit card per day). I never saw these before. I do hope the industry continues to be more heavily regulated to help prevent problem gambling even if it won’t apply to me, like you said I wouldn’t want other people (especially younger naive online gamblers” destroying their lives to this horrible affiction.

    #32802
    Steven187
    Participant

    My last bet was Wed 4th May. I’m still checking betting sites regularly for scores etc and thinking what I would have put on. I realise this is unhealthy, even though I’m not putting any bets on – partly due to self exclusion and also having no money to gamble with. I’ve had a bit of a rude awakening due to the obscene amounts I’ve lost/wasted and have nothing (other than debt) to show for it. It’s taken a period of not gambling to realise how much my mood was affected by my compulsive gambling. I’m feeling good about not gambling, but the debt I owe is acting as a different pressure/burden. I get a few thousand next week. Suppose my plan is to pay off one credit card and see where I am after that. The irony of the situation is that I had really good savings prior to gambling and didn’t particularly need the money and I’m now in a in a position where I would love to have my savings back and the winnings in the bank. I think I will have to look for more hours at work in order to meet my credit card repayments etc.

    #32803
    vera
    Participant

    Dry gambling sets us up for another session of “the real thing” Steven. For years, I went through phases of being broke/banned, which prevented me from gambling but it was there, at the back of my mind waiting to pounce on the next lump of money that came my way, then I would pretend to be surprised when I found myself back to square one, penniless again.
    If you are really intent on holding on to the few thousand that you are due, I would suggest giving it to a reliable person to hold for you or put it somewhere that you cannot have any access to it i.e a Savings account that requires notice. This can be done online which means you don’t have to see the money. In desperation, after a substantial loss last year, I set up such an account. It will take a LONG time to restore what I lost as I am also paying off huge gambling debt which almost totally depletes my income and will continue to do so for approx. 3/4 years.
    That’s the legacy from gambling Steven. My story. Your’s could be similar or it could be very different if you follow the advice given on GT. I ignored it and did it my way for years. Now the time has come to face the consequences of my wilful choices.
    I hope you don’t continue to travel down the path of self destruction which has the capacity to ruin lives.
    Go to GA and watch the members tremble as they share their tales of woe!

    #32804
    Steven187
    Participant

    Hope you are well.
    I’m looking on sites/at scores less regularly, but I was wanting to be honest in my previous post re what had been happening.
    The money I receive next week will be paying off a credit card, so there will be nothing to gamble with.
    I’m currently in a similar position to yourself where it will take me years to pay back what I owe. Gambling again would only make that worse.

    #32805
    theone12221
    Participant

    Hey Steve, dry gambling can be quite dangerous! Hearing about/watching people gamble (in real life or online) can be a strong trigger that can lead you back into the trap.

    I find that whether you think about gambling, place “mental bets” or replay previous sessions in your head, they are all extremely dangerous in the long run.

    Right now you are still recovering from the initial shock of your big loss recently. You need to take drastic measures to ensure you don’t gamble – this may mean removing all access to any available funds you receive or handing complete financial control of your accounts to someone else. Make sure you’re also fully self-excluded as well! Good luck and stay strong.

    #32806
    Steven187
    Participant

    I realise no good would come of gambling again.
    Will attempt to stay strong and not cave in, cheers.

    #32807
    theone12221
    Participant

    You’re going good Steven. The temptations will always be there, we just need to be able to control it/resist it. I don’t know why the pull of gambling is so strong perhaps it’s because there’s no other activity that’s quite like it.

    #32808
    Steven187
    Participant

    Another site today, had a few bets lined up, but haven’t gambled or deposited money into my account.
    The temptation is still there, but I’m thinking about the negativity gambling has caused me, the financial difficulty it’s brought me and it’s not worth the risk.

    #32809
    Steven187
    Participant

    Pathetic as it is, went and placed a bet due to boredom/arguing with my girlfriend etc.
    Put on £500, won £1300, placed another £300 bet and lost, then banked £1000.
    Perhaps walking away when I’m up is part of my recovery, I wouldn’t have done this previously. I would have lost the winnings and then tried to chase it.
    I’m wanting to get to a point where I’m not gambling at all, but I’m not there yet. That would have been 3 weeks gamble free tomorrow, instead it’ll be day 1.

    #32810
    theone12221
    Participant

    Hey Steven,

    I’m glad you were able to withdraw the 1k. But you must treat this as a relapse and something to learn from. How can you prevent those triggers in the future? A win can be even more dangerous than a loss during recovery because it makes us think we can beat gambling again and slowly recoup our losses over time with “controlled gambling”.

    When I had hit rock bottom last year I also went through a series of wins (had like around 8-10 winning sessions in a row and recouped a lot of my losses), however the inevitable blowout was just waiting to happen especially as I was getting complacent again about my gambling. Each successive time you hit rock bottom is more damaging than the last, so I hope you do not fall into this trap! Address your triggers and close down the accounts/self-exclude.

Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 88 total)
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