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I’m writing this tonight because I’m going into my 3rd day clean. No gambling for three days although in my head I don’t feel like this is very long at all, I know it is. I was too angry and upset to post at the weekend from what happened but now I’m coming to terms with the fact that I do actually have a problem. Over the past 3 years I’ve tried many things from Self excluding to cutting up cards. None seem to work but to be honest I think I needed to hit rock bottom before I eventually gave up for good.
Saturday morning I placed a bet on Football and as always was spending the winnings in my head before it had actually won. Of course it lost, hours later I’m into hundreds of pounds into the online casino and I’m trying to win back all that I lost. I had plans that night and had to go as the excuse of ‘I’ve lost too much money tonight gambling’ just wouldn’t work… let alone coming to terms with having to tell people about my problem. Got home after a few drinks… BAM another £500 gone. Gambling after alcohol is never a good combination. Thoughts going through my head that I never thought I would actually go through. I wake up in the morning thinking it was a bad dream, nope not today. I check the bank balance and start panicking over the fact I’ve lost all my savings and In the last week over £3500 has gone out of my account. I hit the casino in the morning… winning most of it back but sure enough i feel the urge to carry on and try and win more. I ended up losing everything.
Gambling is ruining my life. I know that I need to stop. I have no dependants and very little outgoings. But this demon is taking over and stopping me being the good person/happy person that I actually am.
After the awful weekend I turned for help and came to this site and was reading people’s posts. I can now see if I don’t stop the consequences can be severe. Monday was my day 1. I can do this, I can get over this problem and become a better person. I now have solutions in place to help me day by day and overcome this monster that is making me lose every penny/savings I have.
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Well done on your first 2 day’s! The lenght of your gamble-free days isn’t important. You need to be gamble-free just for this day, today.
Yes you have a problem, I have a problem as well. Compulsive gambling is a disease, we tend to forget that sometimes.
Feelings of superiority, superstition and magical thinking lead to thoughts of spending your future winnings.
Chasing losses, is a feeling of not accepting your losses. But losses aren’t important. Realize that in the end it doesn’t even matter if you do win. Winning leads to gambling more, which eventually leads to losing again. As compulsive gamblers, we gamble to win, so we can gamble more and longer.
Of course you’re a good person, most of the compulsive gamblers are. Sometimes I think that gambling is a crime commited by good people. Just like criminals we like(d) to make money fast and in an easy way, but we want it in a legal way. Never ever did we thought we will end here.
Stopping is the right choice.
Wish you the best,
Dave
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Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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Hi Face. Well done on looking for help.
You are not alone with this problem, as you will have seen when reading the other stories here. You will also have seen the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?
What barriers can you put in place? Putting a blocker on your home computer would be a good start, not having easy access to those sums of money would be another.
Thee is a lot of help available in the UK – here, Gamcare, gamblers Anonymous, counselling and more.
Keep posting and let us know the positive steps that you are taking.
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You need to not have access to money.
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Well done on your gamble free time and on the positive actions that you are already taking.
keep posting.
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FISH,
This is wonderful news, Congratulations! I myself just found this site and wrote my journal today. Feel free to read it if you like. One day at a time! We are all here for you, support is so important.
Love,
Faith In Me -
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Well done on 2 G – free weeks, Fish Face.
The struggle subsides as time goes on.
Keep postponing that next bet.
Think of how we struggle when we succumb to the urge to gamble.
It is so NOT worth it! -
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Well done on staying gambling free. I am on the same boat, like many others on this site. Everyone’s story offers me comfort and inspiration, For me it’s only day 2 but I am coming right behind you. Keep going.
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Hi FishFace.
When you have a look at those finances then be honest with yourself. If thigns are manageable then great, if not then get some proper advice. You are in the UK so you can get free expert advice at either the Citizens Advice Bureau or at Stepchange. Lots of options around these days and they will help you get to a manageable place.
Well done on opening up to your friends. ber a little careful with the drinking, just carry the moeny for what you plan on drinking – alcohol can weaken anyone’s gambling defences.
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Hi all, first time on the forums. Day 7 gam free , it feels like the advice already is great.
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So far so good fish face. In some respects you have a long way to go, on the other hand nobody can ever do more than one day at a time. Today. You have achieved today in gambling terms no more than someone who’s been clean 20 years or more.
Just for today, I done it, Vera done it, Charles done it and you’ve done it as well as countless more people in recovery. Well done. Some of us would have found it more difficult than others, some may have woken up in bad moods, others good. Some may have fought urges and others not. It dosn’t matter just for today we didn’t gamble.
Its not nice waking up with the gambling hangover, and the disbelief that your gambling has brought you back to this position..again. It’s an awful feeling that many of us remember well. Personally I felt like that for very long periods, the guilt of what I had done would always play heavy on my mind. Over time it does subside I committed some serious crimes to fund my gambling over the years, many against my own family. I began to realise though that my family didn’t hate me for it, and the only way to pay them back was to change my life and stop gambling.
I’m pleased you spoke to your mates, all be it after a few pints. Maybe try talking to them when you’re sober as well. I’ve found that by talking about things, not necessarily gambling, but more about the consequences and how you’re feeling. You might feel daft at first but you’ll be quite surprised by a true friends reaction. Not everyone thinks we’re all fecking idiots. (Although I’ll be first to admit I’ve acted like it a lot). Getting things of your chest will clear your head a bit, you’ll maybe sleep better without things playing on your subconscious mind.
One day you might even wake up happy! Imagine that. If you can change your life around thats something to be immensely proud of.
All the best.
Geordie.
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Goob job not gambling. I wish I could say the same. I need to stop before it’s too late. I am really really proud of you
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Well done on your gamble free time. It sounds like you are already starting to see the benefits of not gambling. Well done.
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Really pleased for you fish.
Please keep your awareness though, things do get better once the gambling stops, as you’re experiencing now.
I think it’s important to keep on talking to people and to keep your money out of harms way.
A wise man once told me, “just because the circus has left town, dosnt mean the monkeys off your back.”
I love that phrase and remind myself frequently of it. Keep on going the way you are mate if you ever find yourself tempted just come on this forum and look through the threads.
Gambling to us never changes. It will drag you down if you let it back into your life. Keep your awareness and wits about you at all times.
Take care Fish, and keep it up.
Geordie.
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Hey fish face, why have you stopped posting??
I hope it’s because you’ve been busy with life, it maybe because you went back to gambling, I don’t know. Whatever the reason I hope, for your sake, you start posting again.
You’ve tried to give up for years you said when you first posted, and then you posted a lot and got up to day 24 and stopped posting??
Obviously posting on here must have been helping you in some way.
You wrote in your first post ,
“Gambling is ruining my life. I know that I need to stop. I have no dependants and very little outgoings. But this demon is taking over and stopping me being the good person/happy person that I actually am.”Knowing you need to stop and wanting to stop are two very different things. I hope that whatever life is throwing at you at the minute you are managing to be the good/happy person that you are.
Take care.
Geordie.
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Contact the Helpline FF.
Harry is the “techy” guy.
I often get that notice too…I just wait 45 seconds and it works then. It usually happens when you edit your post which I do, compulsively. I can’t cope with reading back on typos!
WELL DONE ON YOUR G FREE TIME! -
I’m looking forward to MY day 33!!! Keep GOING!!!
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Great to see your update, believe it or not I wrote a reply about 1/2 hour after you posted and it wouldn’t let me post, I tried at least 6 times.
Pleased alls well for you.
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Congratulations on day 36, id try to refrain from giving tips to friends and going thru racecards, thats kind of mentally gambling with out putting money on, I no how hard it is, but i think that would be a good move to make as the temptation will lure in.
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Well done on being honest with your mum FishFace.
I would advise against looking at race cards and/or giving tips to your friends. If you do that then sooner or later you might have a lucky streak which will really kick the urges back into life.
Do your friends know that you have decided to stop gambling? You don’t have to tell them about any problem but “I’m not interested anymore” soon brings and end to any conversation about gambling.
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Hi Fishface,
well done on confiding in some people close to you. I always felt like i was living a double life. It feels so good in one sense not to hide things even if we were feeling terrible about the gambling. You’ve put in place so many of the important steps! Stay aware, as when you least expect it the urge will strike. Take care and have a great gamble free day, Laura
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Whats going to happen when you get to day 100?
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Well done on your 100 days im really pleased for you, life must be a lot more happier for you
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Hey FF
Can’t believe its 3 months or more since your last post, hope you’re still going well.
On your last post you said, “when I feel like I might be short of money.. I can’t lie I think I can make that quick fix of 5K or 10K. I know deep down it’s not an option”, I’m afraid I disgree.
Lots of people will say gambling is not an option. Sadly, I think, it will always be an option to each and every one of us. The thing is learning to say no. Rather, chossing to say no.
Let us know how you’re getting on mate.
Take care.
Geordie.
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