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    • #52837

      Today! Tonight! This minute! I QUIT

      I have been browsing this page for the past 4 hours and i am very convinced i can get help from others that understand what i am going through. I have decided tonight that I QUIT gambling FOREVER.

      I am a 28yo living in South Africa. I have been gambling for about 4 years now. I was first introduced to the slot machines where i won a jackpot with a very little amount of money. It was unbelievable that i could win so much with such little amount of investment. I was convinced that i have found meaning and discovered a true way to change my life indefinitely. It did change my life but not in the way i had imagined it. I could spend hours writing about all my loss and pain from gambling since then. I lost interest in the machines very quickly and within a month, i was playing at the roulette tables. It has been a downhill journey for me since then. To keep is short, i have lost so much.

      I recently discovered online sports betting and within a space of one month, i have lost more money than i will loose in the casino in 6 months. Now my finances is is disarray, i owe so much money to so many people.
      I have lied to so many people to finance my gambling. Tonight, i just lost almost all the money in my account chasing my losses from last week. I am not sure how i will get through the rest of month and year. I have to and want to quit. I have gone a few months without gambling and once i go back, i can’t control myself. I loose at the casino’s and online sport bets take whatever i manage to not loose at the casino. Even when i win at the casino or online, i place the money right into another bet and loose it all. My life is going to be a struggle, my reputation is so important to me and i fear i will not have that for much longer as i won’t be able to pay the people i took money from, happiness is something i haven’t felt in a really long time.

      I will take any help i can get from the community here. I want to take it one day at a time. I vow not to ever gamble a single cent ever again but i will need all the help i can get.

      Thank you


    • #52838

      I just had a thought to write down one of my numerous humiliating gambling experience. There has been so many but this is the one that comes to mind more often;

      I planned a Christmas holiday for i and my bf in 2017. I wanted really to give him a fantastic holiday as we have had a rough year as a result of my reckless management of money. He believed i had been carrying my family financially and that is why i have had a bad year but the truth was my gambling problem caused all my problems that year. I stopped gambling and saved up enough for the holidays. I planned it and paid for the accommodation and a few activities. When we got to the city, we were very happy and excited about the next few days. I booked our accommodation for 2 weeks and had a lot of exciting activities ahead of us. 3 days into the holiday, i discovered a casino very close to our accommodation. The prospect of gambling in a new casino, in a new city was overwhelming and i couldn’t resist. I lied to my bf that i had to drive out to buy some food and refill the car since we will be making a long drive the following day to a tourism site. I started off betting low and then high. I lost 100% all the money budgeted for the holiday and only had a small amount of saving left. The money left was still enough to see us through the holiday if we managed. I left that day and next day i was back with the savings when we returned from our drive. I lost all the savings that evening .

      I had to cut short the holiday after only 5 days and lied about my mother being sick and in need of urgent attention. We had to drive back 6 hours on Christmas day. It was a very painful and humiliating experience for me. I swore that day that i would stop and i would never put myself in that situation again but i have done so many more times..again…and again….and again….

    • #52839

      I noticed you commented on my thread and just wanted to say i can relate to so much you are saying. The worst part about gambling is it can make such a great person do such nasty things such as lying or using money that isnt yours. I have even thought about stealing from places to get back the money ive lost. These evil thoughts seem to take over when we are gambling and its not the kind of person i am at all which makes me second guess why im having these thoughts.

      I have the same problem as you where i quit for an amount of time and then the second i start up again i lose everything and start with small bets then just lose complete control. Even when i finally make some money, its never enough and it just makes me want to gamble more and more. No matter how much i tell myself beforehand that i should stop at a certain number or point, i never go through with it and keep playing till i lose everything.

      We need to stop and sort everything without gambling. Gambling is not the answer to our problems, it is the reason. Im more than happy to come back here every day and see how you’re doing with your recovery. We can get through this, time to pay our debts and get our lices in order and stop giving money away to something that doesnt deserve it.

      You’ll get there and so will i

    • #52840

      Hi, thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. It is such a huge relief to be able to let out the pain and disappointment I feel inside. It is sad to have so many people suffering the same thing but it also gives hope that there is a light somewhere at the end of this very long and very dark tunnel. I woke up today even more determined to rid myself of this bug and fix this glitch. It has swallowed my whole soul, mind and mental health but I refuse to give it any more power. It is time for me to get some huge wins and I have realised that the win I need will not be with a bet but with self-control and finally putting my money to good and proper use. I feel happier today than I have felt in the last few years because I strongly believe in myself now and my new found determination will be my drive. I hope you also win in your battle. I have declared war on my gambling addiction and every day without placing a bet or visiting the casino will be a battle won. I will devise strategies and I will fight it head-on with a daily reminder of what gambling has cost me. It is a winnable battle.

    • #52841

      Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

      Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

      Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

      As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

      And on that note….

      I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂

      Take care

      The Gambling Therapy Team

      PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    • #52842

      Im right there with you buddy, i also feel this determination and happiness that things are going to change from here on out.

      I think typing out those thoughts and disappointments also releases it from your body and helps you feel better knowing that someone else knows about it and its people that can relate and understand it. Thats the hard part about not telling the people you love because what ive learnt is that someone who has never struggled with a gambling addiction before will never really fully understand why we have made these mistakes and the bad decisions we have made.

      I use to judge my brother who had a very bad gambling addiction years ago and he would ask me for money to help him feed his family. I remember getting angry at him for being so stupid and losing all his money and then a few years later i went through it myself and soon realized how easy it is to lose everything and i instantly remembered the way i judged him and felt terrible about it. Now he barely gambles anymore and its me going through the struggles. I could have been a lot more understanding of him back then if i knew what i know now.

      Like you said, each day we dont gamble is another win. It makes me enjoy going to bed knowing i can add another day on. Keep your positive mindset and come back to these forums if you ever get a sudden urge. Looking forward to hearing great things

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