6 December 2021 at 11:11 am #144394cat2001Participant
Hi, I’m new here I could really do with ways of staying away from gambling sites how did you do it.
I am a married mother of three about three years ago I started gambling I got myself into about £10k worth of debt even borrowing money out of kids bank accounts. 2 years ago I told my husband and luckily for me he stayed with me and I managed to stop but 18 months later I was back at it and within 6 months I am now in £23k worth of debt my husband has jsut found out. I’m scared he is going to leave me but if he does its all my fault and I will break my kids hearts. I need help in staying away. I have just filled the form in to ban myself for 5 years but fill this might not be enough. Sometimes I feel it would be easier for them if I just left them.
6 December 2021 at 11:12 am #144530DuncKeymaster
Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
The Gambling Therapy Team
6 December 2021 at 11:32 am #144532G RecParticipant
Welcome to the forum and well done on taking a positive step.
In terms of ways of staying away from gambling sites, 2 items that I found particularly useful when I first started trying to stop gambling was 1) Putting as many barriers in place as possible to make it difficult to gamble and 2) having someone else I trust manage finances for a while, In this scenario, you still maintain control over your money, and decide where it is spent, but any spending would have to go through this person first, and you don’t have access to unaccountable money.
It sounds like you are already working on 1) by getting self-banned for 5 years which is a good start. I think doing something along the lines of 2 could also be very helpful to you. Perhaps your husband could be the person who manages your finances for now, while also removing any direct access you have to your kids bank accounts.
The new member’s groups Charles mentioned held on a Monday and Thursday are also very useful, here you can speak with Charles who can provide further advice and recommendations.
One final thing I found useful was committing to regular updates on the forum be they good or bad, I started with once per week, but you could choose a different frequency, I look forward to reading your updates.
6 December 2021 at 9:29 pm #144563charlesModerator
Hi Cat, Well done on looking for help. Read the otehr stories here, you will read a lot that you will relate to. You will also see the success stories and the sorts of thigns that have helped others stop gambling – what can you apply to your own situation?
There is an old saying – actions speak louder than words. the actions that will help you stop gambling are the same actions that might help rebuild trust with your husband. Actions like getting excluded, being accountable and limiting access to funds so that you can’t gamble. Importantly actions like getting to support, posting here, groups, maybe Gamblers Anonymous meetigns – if we could do it on our own then none of us would be here.
Keep posting and let us know what positive actions you are taking.
15 December 2021 at 2:06 pm #145071nlynch91148Participant
Lovely to meet you. I am 31 and on Saturday I told my wife that i have a problem with gambling. On saturday I self excluded my self from all the site that i had been using and i also downloaded an app called Gamban which blocks your access to over 50,000 gaming and betting sites worldwide. I got a free 6 month subscription and I can honestly say its probably the best thing anyone can you. Once its downloaded and youve been set up. You cant even delete the app.
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