[autumnrose]

Hello all,

My partner is a compulsive gambler and in past we have had many issues, he has stolen from me, he has also lied to me on numerous occasions and been found out. My mum passed away last year and time I needed someone I discovered my partner had gambled and he blamed me saying it was the stress of losing my mum put pressure on him. I know it sounds silly to stay with him, but he has such a kind soul despite this – when I look in his eyes i can see he has a massive heart and dont want to give up on him when know if it wasnt for the gambling he would be a genuinely lovely person.

After yet another slip recently he has admitted he need help and signed up to Gordon Moody, he is going from London to Manchester for this and told his not able to use his phone. I am so glad his doing this and getting the help but dont know what to expect. I know it sounds selfish on me but its longest weve been apart and to not communicate with him is going to be so hard and will constantly be worried about him – as love him to bits. Weve been together six years, no kids, not married. I am encouraging him though as know its 1000% the best thing for him and so glad his getting help and support and am so proud he took this massive step.

Does anyone have any advice or been Gordon Moody/etc and know what to expect? I want to know he will be okay as his nervous. Just really kind of needed to talk to people in similar boat as so many people say oh just walk away but hard when you know someone is a good person just the gambling demon got hold of him.

[velvet]

Hello Hello Autumn
Welcome to the Friends and Family forum.

You are not being selfish, I understand your feelings but your partner is doing the right thing for himself and ultimately for both of you.

I understand why your partner is nervous about going into the Gordon Moody programme and it possibly won’t be enough for him to hear that I know he will be ok – but he will be and so will you.

I will write further to you tomorrow – it is late now.

Anything you want to know – just ask and I will answer.

Velvet

[velvet]

Hi Again Autumn

When is your partner going to the Gordon Moody programme?

Maybe you could join me on either Tuesday or Thursday evening between 7pm and 8pm where we can communicate safely and with no holds barred!

Your partner admission that he needs help is a giant step forward; going on the programme is, in my opinion, the best thing he can do.

It is hard not being able to communicate so it is important that you keep the knowledge that he is in the right place, where he is understood, firmly at the forefront of your mind.

My loved one went through the Gordon Moody programme 16 years ago and it changed his life. It takes courage and determination but with the right tools your partner can live a wonderful gamble-free life, possibly better for having had the strength to face his addiction. Gordon Moody will give him those tools. It is my happy experience that the compulsive gamblers, that I have met and talked to, who have learned to control their addiction, are very special.

I used to call Gordon Moody once a week to make sure that my loved one ‘was still there’ and that he was ok. You can do this too. Facing his addiction is really hard and he needs to be selfish to do it – the time he is on the programme has to be all about him. You might feel left out by this which is why I hope you will keep posting and pop into the group for a good heart to heart.

Keep encouraging your partner – he is on the right road. Please wish him well for me. If he has any questions, he can call our Helpline which is great or maybe join out gambler-only group where he will be welcomed by Charles who will understand your partner and offer good support.

Velvet

• This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by velvet.

[ackrolix]

My cherished one went through the Gordon Moody program quite a while back and it transformed him. It takes boldness and assurance yet with the right instruments your accomplice can carry on with a great bet free life, potentially better for having had the solidarity to confront his dependence. Gordon Moody will give him those devices. It is my blissful experience that the urgent speculators, that I have met and conversed with, who have figured out how to control their compulsion, are extremely unique.
Thanks.

• This reply was modified 2 years ago by Dunc.

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