Get practical support with your gambling problem Forum My Journal you won’t believe what I had done to my family…all caused by gambling..

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  • #9440
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    First, I’m not even a new member from this website. I have registered as a member from september 2012 because then I found I need to do something against my gambling addiction. in 2012 fall I received my student visa in order to study college in San Francisco, so I moved to SF on August, but before that my family had created a bank account using my name(as I was the only one who owns permission to come to U.S), additionally, that account would also facilitate my family to do any business transactions via check. When I arrived to SF I saw it was necessary for me to pay the tuition via check, thus, without the initial intention to take money from the previous account that I mentioned, I went to the same bank and created a new checking account, but since then I found there was 30K in that account. I used to be a gambler(online casino, sport betting…), but with the intention to make a better future I came to study here, but with that money (it doesn’t even belong to me) on the account has brought up a nightmare for me….. I went to the bank, change the mailing address (the bank statement used to be sent to my brother in law in L.A, so I changed it to SF, and I told the banker that I lost the debit card so she gave me a new one, then, I lost 10K in just A MONTH, that was also the moment I came in here to seek help, however, with the intention to chase the loses, I ended up turning in another 10K the next month…. I wanted to suicide, reallly, but after I found out all my family has no idea what I was doing (since my brother in law neither check the account balance now use the card), and he let me know that he was planning to buy a house with the money in that account, thus, he keeps making deposits into that account since then, so far, there is supposed 93K in that account, but it only remains 38K, IT MEANS I HAVE LOST MORE THAN 50K OVER THE LAST YEAR…. I knew I can’t cover the truth, June 14th, I came back to my homwtown for summer vacation, my brother in law and my sister came to San Diego to pick me up, and they told me we need to go to the bank and ask for the bank statement because they need to do a transaction of 50K via check, I was so scared on that day because I knew what I did to that money, but we ended up late, so the next day they ask me again, so we went to the bank and they finally found out there was only 38K left in the account. I was so scared and I did’t admit it in front of the bankers and them, but the banker already appointed that I was the suspicious because it’s impossible that the 2nd account has the same signature to my first one and blablabla, but I just did’t admit it, despite my sister keeps telling me don’t hide the truth if I were that guy who did all of it. I can’t sleep well that night, even, I had a nightmare about it, so the next day I woke up early (4:30am), I packed all my stuffs, and left. I texted my sister about the truth, but God! I swear I have never been so regretted and sad before, I can’t stop crying, I don’t care if you call me pussy or what wt ever, but I just can’t face them and myself….. it has been 3 weeks away since I left, my sister keeps texting me how much she and my parents miss me, but I did’t reply them at all, God!! I feel I must die 1000000+ time in order to reach a redemption. I’m going back tomorrow cuz I’m running out of money outside, I know they won’t kill e or something because we are family, but I dont know how to fix this “hole”, cuz I don’t wanna tell them that I used the money for gambling cuz 3 years ago it already happened once (that time I literally stole my dad’s money for gambling and I ended up kneeling in front of my family and asking them to forgive me)…. This time, my sister told me that she hasn’t told my dad about this yet cuz I’m pretty sure it will turn my dad crazy. Anyway, I’m going back home tomorrow and face my “judgement”, no matter how I would end up, there will be no more gambling in my life….

    #9441
    janey
    Participant

    Hi Xinstory, A Warm Welcome to Gambling Therapy
    Having found us you have also found a diverse community who can help and support you on your recovery journey.
    Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and non-judgemental environment and by reading others stories am sure you will see that you are very much not alone in this addiction
    Please click here to see our services page, feel free to use all that this site can offer…
    To chat with others in real time you may wish to make use of the support groups, the ***** of these groups are advertised under "What’s on and When" or click here to see the weekly group schedule.
    For one to one chat you may want to try the live advice helpline. Click "connect" when these options become available.
    Also to say when you registered we would have sent you an email with an attachment, this attachment will help you navigate the site and find the support you so rightly deserve, alternatively this guide can be downloaded by clicking here.  
    Take Care
    The Gambling Therapy Team
     

    #9442
    stanciulete
    Participant

    My friend..i was born in 1990 like…i have same problem like u..i was betting my brother money..over 13000 euros..in one month..i’m from romania..here are some money..he lost the job of his life for me..only to give me money..now i wanna leave my job ..ive bet a lot of money on my mobile..is a cruist..now i cry..is so har..lets keep in touch..and try to speak about our problem..let me help u..and u help me..

    #9443
    alwaysthefish
    Participant

    Hey xinstory, I feel for you. One thing, however, in your last sentence you state "there will be no more gambling in my life". You don’t know this. I personally find it important not to state with great certainty something very uncertain. There will probably be more gambling in your life. A few months from now, the dust will settle and you’ll forget how you felt today. You’ll think it’s not all that bad and you might give in to a little temptation again.
    OK, about your family, what are you going to tell them? Of course you can tell them the truth, but you can also decide to ***. ***** is easier and often ***** better. But it ***** to be done properly, you need to get creative. Here’s an example off the top of my head: You can tell them that you fell in love with this Russian girl, she was somehow involved with the Russian mafia and they were threatening to hurt both of you unless you pay them lots of money. See the movie "Birthday girl".
     If you dine with the devil, bring a long spoon

    #9444
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    My friend..i was born in 1990 like…i have same problem like u..i was betting my brother money..over 13000 euros..in one month..i’m from romania..here are some money..he lost the job of his life for me..only to give me money..now i wanna leave my job ..ive bet a lot of money on my mobile..is a cruist..now i cry..is so har..lets keep in touch..and try to speak about our problem..let me help u..and u help me..
    I just got home now, after left for 3 weeks, my little nephew almost can call me “uncle”… all my mom tries to say after she saw me is consolation, now I’m only waiting the “judgement” from my sister and my brother in law (cuz the money I lost belongs to them), I will keep updating this man! we should not give up, despite I knew the either 1,3000euro or $5,5000 dll is BIG BIG money for us, but we both are only 23, TWENTY THREE years!!! WE ARE STILL YOUNG, WE HAVE A PUNCH OF FUTURE, there are millions waiting for us in the future if we decide to quit gambling….. despite my parents would probably force me to drop out from school and helping the family business(since I’m studying in U.S and all my family live oversea), I like my studies, but I won’t say a word cuz that’s what I deserve for being a F**king gambler… Now I only hope they give me this last chance to prove that I’m gonna change myself, and hope your brother would also grant you a chance….. I’ve heard a lot of stories that GAMBLING COULD LEAD SOMEONE TO ****, but I can’s believe this kind of story is actually happen to me and you, gambling is even more dangerous than ***** cuz it sucks all your money and…. I remember a guy who works in our family business, he knows that I’m a gambler, and one year ago he told me that “if you keep gambling this will ruin your life”…. now our lives are already ruined by gambling, but the hardest thing I care is that the big scar we left in the heart of our family…. I know that this “scar” won’t be healed within one or two days, but at least we need to do something, WE MUST DO SOMETHING NOW!!!! that’s why Icame home today, despite I’m very worried how would my sister and brother in law treat me, but I don’t care anymore, in fact, after I confess this to my sister I feel a relief…221

    #9445
    stanciulete
    Participant

    God bless and help us…u have a better chance..u are in USA…i’m in romania..i try to went on a cruise ship to work…this will change me..i can bet on this…i know me..but i need a better job..as bartender here i get 300 euros in a good month..you have a family business…i trusth that you will be cured…i have problems with money and gambling..i am very smart..a lot of studys…but this world drag me down a lot…now i work harder to be better..and stronger in everythink…keep in touch brother..if you agree..let’s see how we will be…God bless.

    #9446
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    God bless and help us…u have a better chance..u are in USA…i’m in romania..i try to went on a cruise ship to work…this will change me..i can bet on this…i know me..but i need a better job..as bartender here i get 300 euros in a good month..you have a family business…i trusth that you will be cured…i have problems with money and gambling..i am very smart..a lot of studys…but this world drag me down a lot…now i work harder to be better..and stronger in everythink…keep in touch brother..if you agree..let’s see how we will be…God bless.
    Guess what my brother? I’d rather want to be a guy who has more difficult situation, like the elder people from my race have said: “people who are successful came from difficult situations”… so I believe that a tough life could make a better, smarter and “hard die” person…. I always believe it, even sometimes I hate that I live in a family that has good life level….. but overall, it’s not about what country we are, cuz I had seen people become rich in Afganistan (the poorest place), I mean, the point it’s all about YOURSELF, like my old people has said: “despite your destiny is already defined by God, but, don’t surrender to that **** destiny, try to BEAT GOD”… I’m glad to see you’re sharing your story with me, and I really appreciate to have someone similar to me and share this experience, honestly, I feel very warm now… btw, I just have a long conversation with my sister, she was not that mad but, in fact, she feels sad about me cuz she is the one who has more expectation on me in my family, she is the one who motivated me and being my guide until now, she was also desperate cuz this is not the 1st time I did so wrong (I had already **** to my dad for his money for gambling), but after all, she told me “YOU THINK ABOUT IT, THINK ABOUT ALL THIS **** YOU HAVE DONE….” and she also told me I have to confess when my brother in law came back,,,,,,, and I already heard his words from my sister that :”I won’t pay for his tuition anymore, cuz he already spent it all, hereafter do whatever he’s able to…” I feel depressed now, but like I said, I MUST REALIZE IT CUZ THAT THE CONSEQUENCE OF WHAT i DID…again dude, I’m really happy that you are following my post, and I’d love to keep tracking with you….. please don’t think again about the money we lose cuz that’s just a bit of a hundred million that we could get in the future IF WE STOP GAMBLING, lets make the 1st move, tomorrow is the beginning of a new life for me and for YOU.

    #9447
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by alwaysthefish
    Hey xinstory, I feel for you. One thing, however, in your last sentence you state "there will be no more gambling in my life". You don’t know this. I personally find it important not to state with great certainty something very uncertain. There will probably be more gambling in your life. A few months from now, the dust will settle and you’ll forget how you felt today. You’ll think it’s not all that bad and you might give in to a little temptation again.
    OK, about your family, what are you going to tell them? Of course you can tell them the truth, but you can also decide to ***. ***** is easier and often ***** better. But it ***** to be done properly, you need to get creative. Here’s an example off the top of my head: You can tell them that you fell in love with this Russian girl, she was somehow involved with the Russian mafia and they were threatening to hurt both of you unless you pay them lots of money. See the movie "Birthday girl".
     If you dine with the devil, bring a long spoon
    I know what you are saying cuz it already happened once to me, in fact, this time I “fell” even harder: I ruined 53K dll from my family, despite my family has business and it doesnt REALLY hurt, BUT IT STILL HURTS you know what I mean? it’s like I had asked myself that WHAT CAN WE BUY WITH THESE MONEY? a fancy sport car, a house back in my hometown…. honestly I feel I might said that just by ****, but time will prove my determination, and so I will keep in touch to this group….I need to move on cuz gambling only ruined the 1/4 of my life, there is still 3/4 part of my *** waiting for me…

    #9448
    stanciulete
    Participant

    Now i’m at work..and here I usually gamble…but today..i have all of these..today i have a “brand new brotger” i can sherr with him my mistakes…and he don’t jugde me..he only want to help me..that u ..and..this what is here is good…if i’m here means i have a problem..i’we told my mom and father..about my problem..they want me to cure…i don’t have money for a psiho now…in 3 months i will repay my last 600 euro that i have to pay..now i work only for 200…its hard..i want to go out of country ..to earn more..i want a family for me…it’s hard….i start to cry when i think what i did all my life…i’m better than yhis i know it..i need only 1, 2 maybe 3 month at start anf after this my illnes will be more eady to cure..about your sis..and your bro in law…good luck..and i have trust that they will help you..but not with money..with our illness…this will turn to be..one of our first good day to be us…becouse we have our friendship now..

    #9449
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    Now i’m at work..and here I usually gamble…but today..i have all of these..today i have a “brand new brotger” i can sherr with him my mistakes…and he don’t jugde me..he only want to help me..that u ..and..this what is here is good…if i’m here means i have a problem..i’we told my mom and father..about my problem..they want me to cure…i don’t have money for a psiho now…in 3 months i will repay my last 600 euro that i have to pay..now i work only for 200…its hard..i want to go out of country ..to earn more..i want a family for me…it’s hard….i start to cry when i think what i did all my life…i’m better than yhis i know it..i need only 1, 2 maybe 3 month at start anf after this my illnes will be more eady to cure..about your sis..and your bro in law…good luck..and i have trust that they will help you..but not with money..with our illness…this will turn to be..one of our first good day to be us…becouse we have our friendship now..
    Brother, I feel the same, it’s so warm to have someone to share this life experience, and please don’t give up easily, I know that might be difficult for you about how much you gain for month, but please don’t turn that mind into this: that gambling could help you increase your income…please trust me, THIS IS BULLSHIT, it’s like no matter how much you win, a million, a billion? I don’t care, you will end up losing that million or billion you win + your life saving (again, this is what happening to both of us), I know it’s very difficult to make the 1st move my brother, but please listen to me (right now it’s 1am and I’m still here talking to you and waiting for the last “judgement” from my B.in law) if you can make the 1st step, you can move on following that step, but please DON’T EVER NEVER step back, cuz if you do so you will definitely going back (like what I did, now see how I ended up, losing 53K this once comparing to 13K of the first time)…please keep stick with this post man,I’m not a counselor or someone like that, I’M WHO HAS THE SAME PROBLEM LIKE YOU, AND WE NEED MUTUAL HELP…..

    #9450
    stanciulete
    Participant

    Hey how was your day so far…i’m going crazy…i’ve made 2 bets..total sum 10 euros…hope tommorow for nothing..and another 3 4 5 …an so on..today was a bad day..i had a chance to win…but the madness catch..tomorrow will be better i know..how are u ..u talk with B in law ?

    #9451
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    Hey how was your day so far…i’m going crazy…i’ve made 2 bets..total sum 10 euros…hope tommorow for nothing..and another 3 4 5 …an so on..today was a bad day..i had a chance to win…but the madness catch..tomorrow will be better i know..how are u ..u talk with B in law ?
    Not yet, since last night he came bk very late for business, when he came home I was kinda”slept”(it’s like I feel weird to talk to him)… But so far, my dad keeps critizing on me: that studying doesn’t really help me, anyway that my school career is done cuz my B in law won’t give me help anymore….I really feel the pain now, the uncle who I used to lived when I study in U.S also found out about this cuz my sister has told him all, you know what I feel now? It’s like I was like the guy in my family who is supposed to in touch with success: I’m the only one in family who is studying college, the one who has more knowledge than anyone else in the family, even, my family feel honor because they can’t find someone in the family as brilliant as me…… All because gambling, if there is a time machine, I would like to go bk to 2009, before all this nightmare start.

    #9452
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    Hey how was your day so far…i’m going crazy…i’ve made 2 bets..total sum 10 euros…hope tommorow for nothing..and another 3 4 5 …an so on..today was a bad day..i had a chance to win…but the madness catch..tomorrow will be better i know..how are u ..u talk with B in law ?
    Man it’s like you should exclude yourself from all tv, Internet sport events, I know that kind of feeling, that every time there is a SURE WIN within those selections. But you must think now: what r u gonna do after win? YOU JUST KEEP BETTING N BETTING CUZ YOU DESIRE TO WIN MORE, but, this wont happen, cuz all these loses start with a small winning, do you get me? Please do some initiative NOW… I’m on my way back to wrk, today is the beginning of my new life, hope the same for u brother.

    #9453
    stanciulete
    Participant

    Thanks bro…good luck…hope you will be good…i’m here with u..thanks for advice..we had same feeling…when i look at tv..i see only odds and favorites..need to go and work on a cruise ship…or..go on a montain . .or to be strong…take care friend..

    #9454
    xinstory1990
    Participant

    Originally posted by stanciulete
    Thanks bro…good luck…hope you will be good…i’m here with u..thanks for advice..we had same feeling…when i look at tv..i see only odds and favorites..need to go and work on a cruise ship…or..go on a montain . .or to be strong…take care friend..
    Good luck my brother, no matter where you go please keep this on tracking…. Today I had my 1st day on work after these 3 weeks I left home, and Yes, I had to face my brother in law, of course he is still MAD about what I did, but I feel he’s trying to hide that feeling cuz after all we are still family, and family will always support you no matter what you did…. So please hereafter think about your family every time there is a gambling intention comes to your mind, please Re-think it as many ***** as you can, or come to here and read all those painful stories caused by GAMBLING….in fact, that really work for me, and I also read a biography about a guy who lose not only his wife, but his parents both **** because him, so after 10 years he writes his story, that is very touching, and we should really thank God that we haven’t become that guy yet, maybe that’s the chance tha God grant us man, and we can still make the redemption for it….this is Apall I want to share with you today…. Just got back home from work, tired but finally feel RELIEF…. trust me man, you can also do it, life is much more to enjoy than gambling, in did realized now that the money I won before I never spent on something useful for me, it’s like I have no fear to place a 2000dll, but I always cry to have a Mac book which is only about 1500dll…. ****, I could have had a Mac book for 35 time with those 53K I lose….but I don’t wanna lose any more chance to have a Mac book, and I can only have it through hard working…… My brother, pleaee understanding all these I have told you, please don’t hurt anymore the people who love you….

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