[dchoye]

Charles
I really like the topic groups and it help me in my recovery
Its a shame that not avaible tonite
Hopefully back next week

Dchoye

[dchoye]

Hi Faith

I’m glad you have join this site and journey to stay sober from gambling.
You are doing yourself and your family a great service by this big step.
God Bless

[dchoye]

IDI,

I haven’t read your entire posts, but I applaud your courage to be here and helping yourself.

We cant do it alone when trying to recover.
There’s a lot of good resources here and at your local GA

Keep posting and let everyone know how you are doing
We all care.

God bless
DC

[dchoye]

Hi everyone.
Just dropping by and letting all the friends here know that I am still GF.
I no longer wake up thinking about making the next bet.

I have a more productive day.
I dream about family, friends, love ones, new and exciting endeavors for the next day instead of gambling.

When I read my posts from 4 years ago, it is almost like seeing a photo of myself as child.
It’s me but its not me.

Now , I know myself better
I know what temps me, what I need to avoid, where I go for encouragement, what I need to read for inspiration.

Those who wish recovery, I urge you to go local recovery meetings. Not to be afraid . Go for 30 days and then decide for yourself. What is the worse that can happen?

Best wishes.

I not going say “good luck” for your recovery, because it’s not about luck. It’s about being honest with yourself and being committed for self improvement.

Recovery is fulfilling when it is earned.

Recovery will come regardless of “luck”
“Luck” is for gamblers.

DC

[dchoye]

HI Everyone.

Hopeful your recovery has progress and for those who are in despair I wish you can find the courage to continue to seek help and attend GA for support.

For myself, Been doing well and GF for 3 years.
I been working hard on my 12 steps and today I wanted to share a quote from Timothy 6:10

“The love of money is the root of all evil”

While money is require for the world to turn around and neccessay , it is the LOVE of money , not money itself that is the root of evil.

One gets desperate, materialistic and greedy,.
These are all defects of character that can be overcome no matter how strong those feeling are.
Believe me I have felt all those feelings very strongly.

I think its important to make amends to myself and people around me who are hurt by those defects.

Try to recognize when we are wrong and admit to it.

God Bless

DC

[dchoye]

Hi Harry, thanks for being kind to respond.

I miss the group there…Janey, Charles et al.
Since the website changed I have not been able to navigate into the topics sessions.
I think I like those the most.
They were very good for my recovery.

Yes, the journey to recovery has been paved with peaks and valleys, slips to hopelessness and finding courage to acknowlege my true self.

The journey has been enlightening and spiritual.
I had to read what I wrote 3 years ago to remember what I felt like cause I dont feel like the same person.

[dchoye]

Hi friends.
Its been 3 years since I started this journal.

The serenity prayer has been very helpful to me.
Whenever I feel frustrated , I tend to want to takes chances.
Once I feel peace and serenity, I then find courage to change my habits.
Dont do it alone. Going to 12 steps meetings has given me the inspiration and courage to not only help myself but to help others.
Only by being free from the boundary of gambling addiction can one think clearly and achieve better wisdom.

Also notice that eating properly, sleeping well, and staying fit gives me strength to battle gambling addiction.

Often when I was a hard core gambling addict I would lack sleep/not eat and stay sitting at the tables. All these made me weak and soft and fuel the gaming addiction

[dchoye]

Hi Friends.
Been over a year since my last update.
Happy to text that Im still gamble free.
One of the blessing of being gamble free is being able to participate in other activities that time consumed at gambling didnt allow myself
Im having better relations with family and friends.
I still have thoughts about gambling but it doesnt consume me as much as it once did. That is one of the reasons I dont come to this site as often any more.
There is hope for some of you still stuck in this painful cycle.

Continue to pray to my higher power gives me strength.
Blessing everyone.

[dchoye]

Originally posted by paul315

Originally posted by dchoye
… The casino will also be there …

Good morning DC,
Well done on your gambling free *****, and well done of allowing rational thinking and you Higher Power to have control over this addiction the past week. By using the help found in reaching out to our HP and taking the time to think you are right, "There is no need to feel a compulsion to gamble".  I had the exact same experience a few weeks ago, and I too reached the same conclusion. I was on my way to gamble again but when reaching the parking lot, a lot that held countless cars was full, so I drove off; an unusual intervention that overcame the power of the addiction.
As you have came to accept, during our passing through the shadows of this valley of death we need to lean on the staff that keeps us from slipping; the gambling industry will always be there and tempting us 24 hours a day. But we can overcome temptation, if it is their temptations and not us tempting ourselves; that temptation is brought abut by complacency and thinking that it is only "me" and not our working and following a program of recovery that is making a difference.
God’s speed. Stay strong. Keep being active in your recovery. Keep enjoying your family and friends, an immeasurable benefit of living gambling free.
Larry
Thanks to my Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT,  "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.
Yes LarryIn insanity,  I forgot that gambling bookies and casino will always be there .Certainly everyday if not 24 hours.When we are compulsive we lose our mind. False beliefs and irrational thinking.Take time to pray and meditateRealize and compose yourself That all God ask for you.Make a good choice rather than an impulsive choice.Blessing everyone.T

[dchoye]

Be well my friends

[dchoye]

Hi everyone
I been off the bet for much off this year
Was tempted a few ***** last month
I remember in the height of my compulsion when i join GT a year ago.
I would feel compel to rush to the casino after work and even got many nasty speeding tickets on the way there.
Last month i had a day off work, and felt urge to gamble, to experience that thrill again
I drove to the casino, this time without speeding.
Got to the parking lot, didnt get out of the car , said a serenity prayer.
Then voice inside asked me "did you really need this?"
"do you need misery?"
call it my HP, or God or whatever you believe.
I answer "no…no I didnt"
The casino will also be there, will stay open 24 hours, to temp us.
There is no need to feel compulsion to gamble.
So after that i felt this internal peace.
My mind was settled and  my heart wasnt racing any more
I start my car and drove away from the casino
The rest of the day I enjoyed it with my friends and family.
 
 

[dchoye]

Sunny , I hope this year will be better than last year.
I enjoy chatting with you this past month.
I have some similarities to your story as I also have 2 young children, and also having some martial discord. Recent arguments and talk of separation tends to make me more likely to gamble.
I also never gambled until I got interested in the stock market during the tech boom and bust of the nasdaq market in the late 90s and early 2000 years. I too, was memorized by the possible exponential growth of the stock prices.
I stopped being obsessed with”playing” the market about 5 years ago. Maybe the market dried up after the nasdaq crash. Maybe I was too tired of the hours i spend researching the industry and companies that would never match the insider info that others could gather that were in the stock business. Maybe I convinced myself there is manipulation of the prices of commodities and stocks . Maybe I created losses and was to stubborn to admit to myself till now.
One of my accounts had no activity for many years.
I just closed it recently . I kept it to as a painful reminder of the few valuable stock holding I had that were now essentially worthless and how I was a fool to get involved in the markets.
I still dream of having extreme monetary success like a George Soros or a Warren Buffett but that is just a dream….that’s not my life….and I have to live my own life.
keep with the journaling Sunny , i enjoy your dairy and hope to chat with you again.

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