Gambling Therapy logo

Forum Replies Created

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 357 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • in reply to: returning #30941
    female g
    Participant

    just had a wonderful party for hubby.s retirement on Friday night. A hundred people showed up at my hotel where the party was held. Loved every moment of it. reconnected with old friends and family. A great number of teachers came out to help celebrate. I hired a great music guy and my daughter sang 3 songs too. The kids had a great speach prepared and Hubby did a great job too on his. Danced to the wee hours .So much fun.
    Saturday we were treated to a lovely dinner made by our son in law and our youngest daughter. We were joined with her inlaws and it was awesome.
    Sunday we again celebrated Father’s Day with our other children and enjoyed a barbeque. Beautiful weather and a fabulous weekend.
    Hubby has just a week of work left and begins a new chapter in is life and I am excited for him.
    Life is good and lots to look forward too. FG

    in reply to: returning #30940
    female g
    Participant

    thanks Mav, for dropping in. I was happy to see a message waiting for me as its been awhile since I’ve felt like posting. For a few reasons I’ll share. I had to work a few extra shifts lately and that simply wears me out. Summer is the biggest factor though since there is so much to do and things going on. Lots of outings and get togethers that we have really enjoyed. The biggest thing is getting a big retirement party organized for my hubby. He is ending his job at the end of this month. so lots to do for that.
    I am working hard to not gamble and fighting urges alot. After losing my best friend I felt like I didn’t give a damn about much, so it left me feeling like nothing matters.
    Trying to turn that around now and get back to what matters in life. Picked up more routine swimming too, Still working on the main floor paint job too. I need a holiday soon !!!
    That”s about it for now.
    I do want to wish everyone well and hope that you all are in a good space in life. Staying gamble free is my hardest goal but knowing we are all in this together really makes a difference for me. FG

    in reply to: Just for today I will not gamble #31619
    female g
    Participant

    doing great and we all know that doing great is a very difficult thing.
    The most puzzling thing I find is that even with all the tools, barriers and information urges can take hold and undue everything in a split second. What I have learned from that is there is never a time when taking a risk to gamble can ever work out well for us cg’s. We must never gamble if we are going to succeed at being gamble free.
    I took that chance and now feel like I’m battling harder than ever not to gamble. It is worthwhile battle though and I am going to stay in the fight just like you and Lets plan on never going to gamble again ever, ever,ever ok FG

    in reply to: returning #30937
    female g
    Participant

    I am happy to say that I got myself home and didn’t gamble. I was wanting to go and was looking forward to the self deserving short lived buzz. I would have gone if it wasn’t for Hubby calling me and making me know I needed to get my as… home where I belonged. It was just what I needed to help me know what I needed to do and that was not let my hubby or myself down.
    Relief was my reward and my pay off. I felt a little disappointment but I also felt safe.
    Ready for a challenge of another week. FG

    in reply to: returning #30936
    female g
    Participant

    Well its over and I’m home and just going to relax now. I am going to just keep fighting ideas and urges to gamble and work hard to never go again. I’ve realized that no matter how much gamble free time I accumalate I can never again attempt to just have a fun night out gambling. it won’t work for me and I think Im seeing that clearly now.
    accepting this outcome is the only choice I can make and it has to be a lifetime choice FG

    in reply to: BELIEVE (new thread) #23909
    female g
    Participant

    this online thing is it free or does it cost money??? Either way we all know the risk we take when we play with fire , we get burned. There is no other way to see what happens when this addiction takes over our lives.
    After losing my closest friend I decided to not give a damn and go gamble, after all I needed to have some fun after that. Not a good idea because I wasn’t satisfied with just one visit and went a second time and then a third. Now Im left fighting urges and a mind full of gambling thoughts. So not worth it !!! I.m just about done paying off the last 12 thousand I spent and it worries me that I might not be able to control this addiction once I feel I’ve paid it off. I need to realize once again there is no way I can gamble reasonably ever. Thank goodness I can’t get my hands on much cash at the moment or I may have caused serious damage. I am relieved about that.
    Do what you know needs doing and don’t allow the things that you find difficult provide cause to gamble. We know that it is never ok to find excuses to do this.
    I am going to work at controlling myself again and get back to doing the right thing and that is simply not gambling, join me why don’t you and we can support one another. FG

    in reply to: returning #30935
    female g
    Participant

    That’s the plan P I am back on track and hiccups are curable. I am in for the long hall and ready to buckle down and get on with it.
    Still need to work less over the next few years and hopefully I can make arrangements in the next year. I’m not getting any younger and its time to learn a better way so that I don’t end up missing out on the things I deserve to enjoy.FG

    in reply to: returning #30933
    female g
    Participant

    This all makes sense Vera and I’m trying to keep my head in the right space.
    Exhausting work week.
    Physically worn out due to being under the weather.
    No gambling urges though this week.
    Some great news for my children, two of them got job promotions and one had a wonderful holiday in Hawaii and that makes for a great way to celebrate Mothers Day. The down side is there will be little time to celebrate the day since I have to work this Sunday due to staffing issues 🙁

    in reply to: returning #30931
    female g
    Participant

    urges urges urges !!!!
    So its true those urges are persistent and annoying to say the least. No one to blame but myself for that. I deserve it I guess when you flirt with gambling and you think your in control. I am frustrated for sure. I am fighting them but wishing I could go for just some fun but I see clearly that this is dangerous thinking. I’m only wanting something I shouldn’t have I guess.
    Do you ever get to the point when it all makes complete sense and you just stop wanting what you can’t have.???
    One of my co workers tells me she just won 13 thousand and even shows me the cheque and seems to win very often and all I can ask myself is why her and not me ????
    Well back to the drawing board as they say and try to convince myself that is not good for me on any level.
    Right now I truly can’t trust myself so I am relying on my hubby to keep me in check until I rebuild my confidence in myself.
    I want to pass on my regards to all of those that I share with and let you know I’m thinking of you all but right now I just can’t get into posting much or commenting on your threads. hope you understand and hopefully Ill come around soon.FG

    in reply to: returning #30930
    female g
    Participant

    thanks soo soo much for the words of encouragement and support. It really is appreciated. Just what I need at this point.
    I am going to work harder at remembering what we begin to forget after not gambling for good amount of time. why that is isn’t always clear but I don’t want to fall back into bad habits and bad decisions that could greatly impact my life.
    I think I begin to feel confident after staying away and start to lighten up on barriers etc. Time to change that and focus more on recovery I guess.FG

    in reply to: returning #30927
    female g
    Participant

    well lets put it out there. I did it again !!! Still no financial damage but wasted money is not good either. I could do more with any extra cash I know, but after a difficult and extremely busy week I couldn’t talk my way out of a well deserved evening out. I paid all bills and had a few hundred left so away I went. My worry is that I am going to start something I can’t stop again. I told my hubby and he understood why but I know he is dissapointed In me.
    I am going to try to stop myself before it gets to late and I find I will create a bigger problem. I will hand over more money and if there is extra we can both decide how to have fun together and use it for us and not me. onward and upward again. FG

    in reply to: returning #30926
    female g
    Participant

    at this point I find tears and laughter hitting me often at the same time. I find I’m busier then ever these past few weeks perhaps trying to avoid too much quiet time.
    The one good thing I am happy about now is that spring has finally sprung. I love this time of year. Everything is new again.
    I had a great visit with family I don;t often see and it went really well. Time to reconnect I guess.
    I went to a baby shower too and enjoyed seeing folks we rarely see too.
    Sunday I spent the majority of my time outdoors. Cleaned up the back yard so that we can enjoy the outdoor space.
    trying to relax a little now. No gambling and dept is getting paid.:( FG

    in reply to: today I lost everything #29263
    female g
    Participant

    quick comment… One thing I learned in recovery is that it is next to impossible to rely on loved ones, spouses, or family when it comes to understanding this Addiction, or any other for that matter. That is why sites like this, GA meetings, therapy make all the difference. When we can relate and learn from those in similar circumstances we advance in recovery. We see our mistakes and can find solutions too.
    Family makes it difficult getting past guilt, duty and responsibility. FG

    in reply to: returning #30924
    female g
    Participant

    April has been taking forever to warm up here. On the news they said we had more snow in the first 11 days of April then we had all winter. Crazy right?? I find once April arrives I am usually up lifted knowing spring has arrived. Not so much this year. Thank goodness this weekend will be much warmer and everything should feel new again. Excited to see new growth everywhere for sure.
    I am going to start working out again and return to my swimming. Been long enough without routine.
    Focused and fearless. No gambling either. FG

    in reply to: returning #30922
    female g
    Participant

    Overly busy these days, if it isn’t work related its one project after another to keep my mind of what my heart is really feeling. I am sad tonight as I sat after painting for 6 hours. Thoughts of my friend flooded my brain and then my eyes and all I could think about was wishing she was here. FG

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 357 total)