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#22515
kathryn
Felhasználó

Hi All,
Well today i let my guard down, and i didnt realise i had done it until i got on the helpline.  Hmmm, am i testing myself, maybe in my subconsious i am, maybe that little voice just said, its ok, you can go. No, i didnt gamble, but i went out for lunch at one of my very favourite venues.  Favourite because it is open really late and i used to gamble close to home and then go in there because i knew id have a few more hours.
So, what does it all mean?  It means that i have to be extra vigilant, that i have to pull my finger out of my a$$ and stay the hell away from there, no matter how good the lunch menu is!!
I cant say that i thought about it at all during our lunch, maybe i got cocky.  But in hindsight, it could be the beginning of the end.  And it is the end, of ever going to a venue for any reason whatsoever.  Im not going back, thats all there is to it, my life is too good now to let anything, no matter how insignificant i think it is, get in the way of my recovery.
Ive just had a long, lovely shower and im sitting here on this very warm night, smelling the air and listening to the crickets singing.  I have one more week of work and then we are going on a little holiday, just for a week, but where we go is so beautiful, so full of oxygen that i always feel totally rejuvinated when i get home.  My mum and sister are coming too, which only makes it better.  My sister and i sit up and watch old movies in bed, eating icecream…hmmm, i dont know that my diet will allow for that.  Speaking of, as of today i have lost 4kg.  I am thrilled and although i have cheated just a tiny bit, the fact that the weight is still coming off is great.  Once i get to my goal, about another 5kg i think, i will need to start the toning part…oh what fun.
anyway, ive rambled a bit tonight, you all have a great weekend.
Take care, bye for now, kathryn xxxSometimes you have to step outside of the person you’ve been, and remember the person you were meant to be, the person you wanted to be, the person you are.