[kin]

Dear dairy

Something is happening to me now. Today I saw one of the many signs again. After another long night at work, I was tired mentally and physically.

Signs is showing I am weaker nowadays and it is affecting me very badly. I wish to hide this but I don’t want to do that in my journal.

When I was tired mentally and physically today, I actually wanted to revoke my non casino exclusion ban. I wanted my self medication options open, I was desperate enough to consider this stupid measures, it is crazy and totally insane.
The thought was strong before the sleep but it disappear completely after my sleep. Look like I am more unstable nowadays.