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I think being a survivor is a great big precursor to addiction for a lot of us. Gambling for me anyway fills a lot of the holes created by being a survivor. But in a false way. And as soon as the reels stop spinning 🙁 all that’s left is a big hole and lots of financial carnage.

I too fear telling my husband about my serious relapse. He told me 6 years ago that if I put another dollar in a slot machine he’d leave me.

I hope when I get to the end of your thread you are in a better place.